She tapped me on the leg, “Give me your radio?” I paused for a moment. My iPod? Is that what she wanted? I must have misheard her. I lean in to hear her better as she repeats herself, again pointing to my iPod, “Give me your radio?”
I told her, “no” though looking back, really it wouldn’t have mattered either way. I’m not particularly attached to my iPod and she wouldn’t have had a way to charge it. It probably would have made her happy in the moment though.
But is giving an iPod really what she needs? I mean, sure, I can do without it but now that I look back at this situation, I keep asking myself, “What was she really hungry for?” I mean, I don’t know, maybe she really did just want my iPod. Something tells me there was more to it though.
I just finished a book called Compelled by Love by Heidi Baker in which she quotes Mother Teresa a whole lot and one quote that I particularly liked was as follows:
Hungry for love, He looks at you.
Thirsty for kindness, He begs from you.
Naked for loyalty, He hopes in you.
Sick and imprisoned for friendship, He wants from you.
Homeless for shelter in your heart, He asks of you.
Will you be that one to Him?
I don’t want this trip to be about giving things. I feel like these people we meet are used to that which is why that little girl had no problem coming up to me and asking me for my iPod. I want this trip to be about giving myself. Just me. Completely, totally, whole-heartedly me. If that means I feel compelled to give things, so be it, but I don’t want this to turn into charity cases. I want this to be about relationships. I want to actually care about what I’m doing and the people I’m doing it with. I want to go out of my way be that one to Him, to notice and take action when He’s hungry for love or thirsty for kindness. To notice and move when He’s naked for loyalty, sick and imprisoned for friendship. I don’t want to leave my Lord homeless for shelter because my heart has not been opened to Him in the way I treat, or even see, those around me. I want to move; I want to act; I want to care.
So I don’t know, maybe holding onto my iPod was selfish? But I personally think the more selfish thing was not finding out more about her. Not hearing her story. I think that is where I failed to act, not by holding onto some thing.
Lord God, I pray for this month, for this week, for this day, for divine appointments. I pray for you to send people into my life, across my path, that challenge me to move. I pray that I may never settle for simply noticing but always be convicted to move. Lord, I pray that as I go into this month and into this new ministry that you may just propel me to move by love and love alone. May I give of myself sacrificially and not be concerned of the things of this world. May I throw myself whole-heartedly into all that I do, invest myself wholly into each person I meet. May I radiate your love, your joy, your hope into each and every life. May I never make this about charity and always make it about relationship. I thank you and praise you Lord for bringing me here, to this very place, and for allowing me to partner with you in bringing Kingdom. Grant that I may be a beacon of light in dark places and give me the courage, strength, and boldness to do so. I love you my Lord and I thank you for all that you are, all that you’ve created, and all that you challenge us to be.
