Coming into training camp I was told to leave everything behind and throughout the week I realized what they were really saying..
I’m just going to be real and raw with everyone for just a minute or two. The 10 days I spent at training camp were so much more than sleeping outside for the first time, showering using 5-gallon buckets and a measuring cup and eating crickets and fermented eggs.
It filled my soul.
I didn’t know what freedom meant until about a week ago. You go through life, the ups and downs collecting baggage on the way. I didn’t realize how much baggage I had until I had to start looking at all of it.
I felt unworthy. Who am I to preach the gospel to people when I feel like such a mess?
Bitterness, pain and unforgiveness. All the people who have deeply hurt me over the years; broken friendships and relationships.
Shame. Feeling ashamed of some of the things I have done in my past and letting that still define me.
Unloveable. Brokenness from past relationships.
Failure. Not finishing my Nursing degree or getting into the program I wanted out west.
All of these things put such a weight on my shoulders but I began to unpack it, analyze it, speak it and share it with people. I found that I wasn’t alone, many people shared the same struggles.
We all come to a point in our lives where we are tired of carrying so much baggage. It’s possible to get rid of it all by just giving it to the Lord.
I started to rewrite the tape that played in my head, that constantly told me I would never be good enough. I identified the lies and started replacing it with truth:
I am right where I need to be.
I am HIS prize and victory.
I am the Daughter of the King.
I am loved unconditionally by the King of Kings.
I am worthy of love and life to the full with Jesus.
I need to live in the reality of that grace, renew my mind to this new way of thinking. It’s something we can all work on, don’t believe the lies people tell you, believe in His truth.
YOU ARE GODS GREATEST IDEA.
I want people to know that living a life with Jesus doesn’t mean you’re perfect or have to follow all these rules. He loves you as you are. He wants you to love others with that love. THAT’S IT.
Unconditional and unending love no matter your past.
Just love people well.
It’s not declaring what we must do, its declaring what He has already done!
Jesus wants to give you peace in the pain. He wants to give you what you lost through Hope, Joy, and LOVE.
My role on the race is to further the kingdom. To set people free from their burdens they carry. To show others the LOVE of the Lord, a love that never has to be earned.
God is love and that love is FREE people!
Everyone on this earth from the forgotten, the millions of orphans and widows, the untouchables of India, the unloved, they may not be chosen in worldly eyes, but to Jesus we are ALL chosen and wholly and dearly loved! (Colossians 3:12-13)
The past 10 or so days helped me break down the walls inside and around myself. Jesus has told me to be BOLD and live life without fear.
I want my story to empower people, to help them grab ahold of Jesus and feel His love. I want to help people commit to a life of sharing this love.
I’m all in.
Heres the sisters I will be traveling with in the beginning of the race next year. I hope that you can join me in praying BIG prayers and that God will keep showing us more about what its like to further His kingdom in the world.
