This has probably been the most common question i’ve gotten since announcing my exciting news. And the short answer is: I can’t explain it.
It wasn’t one major event or moment that rocked my world; it’s been many seemingly-little experiences and encounters, and as I began to note them and process it all – it’s a miraculous story of our Savior’s great faithfulness and almighty power.
The following has been noted/journaled by me from various church services, bible studies, prayers, etc. This gives you a little glimpse into my story and how I am beyond-a-shadow-of-a-doubt confident that this is exactly where I’m supposed to be. And for the record…none of this is exaggerated:)
Summer, 2012: Randomly sat next to a missionary at church. I was intrigued by her and her husband’s story; talked missions, exchanged info and I researched their program
Sept, 2012: Missionaries spoke at church about their relational ministry in Bologna, Italy. I was intrigued and wanted to learn more.
Oct, 2012: Bible study lesson on the season of waiting
– “My ‘waiting areas’: next steps in career, moving?, asked what am I doing with my life?”
– “The seasons of waiting are when and how we start to look a lot more like Christ”
Dec 1, 2012: Bible study lesson on surrendering
Surrendered my “next steps” to Him-I had always lived controlling everything perfectly, all by myself
Dec 13, 2012: prayer journaled about taking a leap of faith
“…I want to be the biggest, best light for you that I can be…help me trust you, let go of my reservations, and be courageous to take a leap…”
Jan 12, 2013: prayer journaled about being in an unsettled place of such unknowns
“Lord I need you…speak to me on what these next and best steps are for my life. What’s the best path that combines my passions, strengths and my gifts? I’m getting an ‘itch’ but i’m unsure of what it is.”
Jan 13, 2013: church sermon on how am I acting for His kingdom
– “Where is God calling me to make HIS name known…NOT mine?”
– “The Lord does not open opportunities in which he hasn’t prepared resources for. It’s time to GO.”
Jan 14, 2013: prayer journaled about my next “calling”
“Reveal to me where I’m being called to be your light.”
Jan 15, 2013 morning: Approached at work about an open position to apply for
Jan 15, 2013 evening: Prayed in desperation for current situation and the unknowns. Prayed for confirmation, guidance and clarity.
Jan 16, 2013: Approached again at work regarding the promotion position
Jan 18, 2013: Approached for a 3rd time, by management, regarding the position (if that’s not confirmation, I don’t know what is:)
Feb 13, 2013: Bible study lesson on surrendering – continued to learn what that looks and acts like
– “We find life when we choose to follow His direction and lose OUR lives; regardless of what we fear giving up, say yes – He will bring joy.”
– “Then Jesus said to his followers, ‘If people want to follow me, they must give up the things they want. They must be willing to even give up their lives to follow me. Those who want to save their lives will give up true life, and those who give up their lives for me will have true life. It is worthless to have the whole world if they lose their souls. They could never pay enough to buy back their souls.’” Matthew 16:24-26
April 28, 2013: Tried a new church for the week and the sermon hit home – I am ready to do something “more”.
– Even though i’d switched up positions at work and was happy, I still had that unsettled feeling
– Prayer journaled “…For months I’ve had a little seed deep within me for the desire of doing something more one day. My logical mind would tell me that’s after my current job, before the next…but help me lay all options out to you, and then listen for your will. I don’t know what continent or country…how long…what I’ll be doing…how I’ll get the resources…or who I’ll go with. But, I know this is in your hands and in your timing. Open my eyes and ears to trusting in you for this next step and hearing your voice when the time is right…”
April 29, 2013: The next day, this was the daily quote in my prayer journal:
“Be assured, if you walk with Him and look to Him and expect help from Him, He will never fail you. –George Muller
May 12, 2013: My first understood “divine appointment”
At a work meeting with a new client, client stopped mid-conversation; he just ‘felt something different’ about my presence – said ‘the Holy Spirit was speaking to him about me’ and that I have certain spiritual gifts and am here to do so much more in life.’
May 19, 2013: Bible study lesson on His perfect plan
– Prayer journaled “Lord, reveal to me and help me hear and see the assignments you’ve laid out for me here on this earth.”
– Philippians 1:6 and Ephesians 2:10
May 29, 2013: I knew He was doing something powerful inside of me
Prayer journaled “Lord, I have no idea what you’re working inside of me but I can tell it’s something. Please help me listen to you and follow the paths you’re making for me. I trust in you and want to follow your ways. These past few weeks I’ve felt very unsettled about work. I’m not sure what it is, other than un-fulfillment and a disconnect. I’ve been wondering if this “corporate” world is best for me right now, as each day passes I’m more frustrated with this broken atmosphere. Stir in me your ways and desires for me to fulfill your work for me here on this earth…”
May 30, 2013: Next day’s quote in journal:
“We do not understand the intricate pattern of the stars in their courses, but we know that He who created them does, and just as surely as He guides them, He is charting a safe course for us.” – Billy Graham
July 7, 2013: Bible study lesson on singleness: “I’m single [right now] for a reason”
– “…an unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world – how she can please her husband.” 1 Corinthians 7:34
– “While you’re single, you’re in control of all your time – you naturally have more time to serve the Lord…travel…work…take risks.”
– Prayer journaled “Maybe this is why he’s kept me single currently; maybe He is preparing me for works ahead to serve Him. Maybe this leads to the itch and unsettled feelings I’ve had these past few months regarding my ‘next steps’? Lord, show me your way.”
Oct, 2013: Pondering a random thought and wrote down – “What does it really mean to ‘Love God’??
Oct 13, 2013: Journaled, in response to a church sermon – “How am I called to live in this broken, messed up world as a Christian??”
Oct 20, 2013: Bible study, topic: surrendering your life and path to Him (ironic how this topic keeps popping up…isn’t it??) and prayed that it’d really resonate with me
Oct 21, 2013: stumbled across World Race website via social media. First thing I see on home page:
“There’s more to life than empty traditions, routines, and working 9-5”
Oct 26, 2013: Texted best friend about the World Race and asking for prayers
Nov 5, 2013: Church sermon on ‘OIKOS – Praying for My World’ (Pastor Mike Glenn)
– “What will I do next to serve my God??”
– “Then He said to His disciples, ‘the harvest is abundant, but the workers are few. Therefore, pray to the Lord of the harvest to send out workers into His harvest.’” (Matthew 9:37-38)
– “We are to GO – whether it’s next door or to another country – and make disciples. It’s not an option but a command to all who call Jesus Lord” (Matthew 28:18-20) – Pastor Mike Glenn
Nov 12, 2013: Church sermon “Do I love Him??” (Pastor Mike Glenn)
– “Love = obedience and obedience = love; love is NOT just an emotion, pleasure, feeling.”
– “Do I really LOVE Jesus? If I claim yes, I must serve and obey him – not follow my desires” (John 15:14, Romans 8:28)
– “Sometimes we give ourselves to Him and He asks us for things of great cost”
Nov 19, 2013: Church sermon “How to love Him” (Pastor Aaron Bryant)
– Major turning point for me. This was exactly what I needed to hear.
– “Remember love is an act of giving ourselves away; ask Him how HE wants me to love (and display it to) those in my life.”
– Closing worship song: “Love says go, go go…if you’re alive and can give just a little hope, love says go…”
Prayer journaled, during the worship prayer time:
Lord, tonight you confirmed for me what I’ve been tampering with…my next steps: serving you however you’re calling. Loving you means GOing. You’ve shown me and laid on my heart that the way I’m called to love is to SERVE you and others…I want to via the World Race, as that’s where I feel you’ve called me. If this is right, continue to show me, Lord. I am committing to LOVE you by serving and GOING.
Early Dec: Began the application process.
[ Continued to pray daily for confirmation and reassurance…and continued to get it. These are just a few of the many instances:) ]
Dec 12, 2013: Got glorious confirmation
Visited World Race website, 2 minutes later get a “daily verse” sent to my phone (for the first time in nearly 2 months) – “I tell you for certain that everyone who hears my message and has faith in the one who sent me has eternal life.” (John 5:24)
Dec 12, 2013 afternoon: Another divine appointment…
Working at a cafe, man stopped me for directions; we chatted for more than an hour. His words of wisdom: “We are all called to do something great. I pray that you will find and have the courage to do the GREAT – you, too, should pray for that ‘great’ thing He has in store for you.”
Christmas break, 2013: Discussed more in depth with parents
Jan 1, 2014: Written application submitted, and that officially began the application process….
The Lord has continued to reveal His confirmation and peace within me that i’m so doing the right thing. I could go on and on…..but this is just a little peek into how He got me to and through the decision process…and not a day goes by that I don’t THANK Him for how He’s gotten me here. He is so faithful.
