I’ve just about all but given up. Before this morning, I transferred money from my savings to my checking account, ready to half-heartedly ask for any other donations that probably wouldn’t come in and pay my remaining balance of $2450. My final fundraising deadline was July 1—well over a month ago.
I’ve done all that I feel I can from across the world. I’m tired of fundraising. I’m tired of awkwardly asking people for money. I just want to pay it off, so I can stop worrying about it. However, I read something this morning that made me question my next steps.
Am I approaching this living in His unmerited favor—His grace? Am I truly depending on Him for this or am I relying on my own efforts?
In my head, I’m thinking that I have more than enough right now that can pay it off myself. And after the Race, I can get a job, and money won’t ever be a problem because I can earn it.
I…myself…these words show that my trust in Him in this area is faltering.
These last couple of days thinking about my future has been tough. There may be opportunities that would require me to fundraise even more and the thought of that terrifies me. Especially being away for a whole year and unsure of what community I’ll have when I get back to America. Knowing that people already want me home now so I can get a “real job.” And knowing that if I can’t raise enough for the Race, how will I ever be able to do it again?
If the Lord calls me to one of those opportunities, I can’t keep relying on my own efforts, and I can’t give up on Him. I need to fully trust in Him and know in all of my being that He wants the best for me and He WILL provide—even when the timing doesn’t look like what I expect.
That being said, I am again asking for your continued support. I am asking you to share this blog with your networks—maybe offices or companies that need a tax break or friends and family who are passionate about supporting missionaries. If you do share or donate, I don’t want it to be out of pressure nor guilt but out of a want to support The Great Commission. Out of an overflowing amount of love and obedience for our great God.
And if you don’t have much, don’t let the amount you’d want to give deter you. $10 from 245 people or $25 from 100 people would be enough.
Only He knows that this blog was guided by the Holy Spirit because I am honestly at the end of myself in this. It’s the last thing I want to do. But I’m doing my best to find my strength in Him to fight on 🙂
—
I’ve said it already but can’t say it enough. Salamat po..kop kun ka..ahkun..cam un..zikomo..maita basa..blagodaryah..THANK YOU to my latest supporters! <3
- James and Janet Herrick
- Mike and Sue Geerling
- Lisa Chau
- Michael and Leslie Lombardo
- Angie McCloskey
- Karen Hawley
- Darrin Nagengast
- Ben and Lauren Manting
- Anna Hill
- Esther and Willis Bouwman
- Linda Whitmer
- Julie Chau
