So tomorrow is Easter. When I was little, this was my least
favorite holiday. The Easter bunny and candy were fun, but I always ended up in
tears at church because seeing re-enactments of the person who was life itself
to me going through such suffering just tore my heart to pieces. I was even
able to take part in one of these re-enactments when I was in middle school,
playing the part of a distraught follower along the Jerusalem road, watching as
Christ carried the cross on which He was crucified through the city…and the
tears that flowed as I stood there were not just an act. Though I knew the end
result was victory over death, and I rejoice in the truth of victory over death
and the grave through Christ, it took me a while to get to the point where I
focused on that and not the suffering. In light of that, a conversation I had
with God a while back comes to mind.
When I was a senior in high school, I felt God calling me to
a romance with Him. I resisted that call at the time because it was such an
overwhelming thought to me…and to be completely honest, given that my main love
language is physical touch, I didn’t trust that God could completely fulfill my
need for love since I couldn’t get a hug from Him like I could from a person. I
remember God telling me that it was okay if I didn’t feel ready at the time but
that a romance between Him and me was where we were headed. God in His grace
did not (and has not) given up on me, and a couple of years later, the summer
following my sophomore year of college, I told God that I was ready to abandon
myself to a romance with Him, though I had no idea what that looked like. That
summer became one of the most incredible explorations of and experiences with
love divine imaginable (I may expound more on that later). That doesn’t mean
that it was all a bed of roses, however. I also learned about the tough side of
love. The first question I asked God that summer set a precedent for this, and for
something He has been teaching me about love ever since: I asked God how I
could love without getting hurt…and He answered, “You can’t. I am love, and I define what it means to love. Remember Me
on the cross-I not only was hurt in loving, I died. You are called to the same.”
Tough truth, but at least I know that the One who calls His followers to such extravagant
love went before us in doing so and conquered death and the grave in the end, so
there is hope in the midst of suffering!
God has since revealed to me a couple of thoughts spinning
off of this concept, which I’ll post in the next few days, but for now, rejoice
in the truth that God is love, and He loved us so much that He was willing to endure
hurt, death even, to show us that love. Truly extravagant love which I don’t
know that I’ll ever be able to fully grasp.
Greater love hath no
man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. – John 15:13
