Fear,
A topic that came up this week, in one of the labs at CGA. And vulnerability, is really the only cure, to that fear and being courageous is the act of vulnerability.
So, I told my team on the race that I had no fear, well now I realize I do.
But I want to start with something that I don’t fear. I have no fear of death in fact I can’t really remember ever being afraid of death, not ever. I went through a time of depression and in that time I had suicidal thoughts, I wasn’t afraid of dying then. I didn’t ever act because I knew the way that it would impact my family.
When I had a heart attack in college I wasn’t afraid to die, it did hurt, but I wasn’t afraid to die, I was afraid to leave my family but only cause of how it would impact them, not cause of the fact that I wouldn’t be there anymore. It was a trying time, don’t get me wrong, but that has never been my fear.
As I look forward, to my future I want to work in closed countries and that could mean that I will end up in places where, daily, Christians are killed, or they go to jail, for years. And I have never felt any fear from it. But that also led me to a place that I wasn’t sure that I could ever have a family or a wife. But on the Race God taught me about his protection. It’s his protection that will take care of them. I will take care of them, but God will take care of them when I can’t.
But there is this thing that scares me all the time. Fundraising, it is really scary, to me. I have let the lies of the enemy say that I’m not good enough for people’s money. But you know what the truth is
He provides food for those who fear him; he remembers his covenant forever. – Psalm 111:5
He will provide all things for me.
The Lord will open to you his good treasury, the heavens, to give the rain to your land in its season and to bless all the work of your hands. And you shall lend to many nations, but you shall not borrow. – Deuteronomy 28:12
And that is simply the truth. That as a son of the most high, He provides the things that are good and he blesses me with what is his.
And the thing is that fundraising isn’t me asking for money from someone, but it is that God is providing for me through someone’s gifts to Him.
So it is you giving a gift to Him and Him giving a gift to me.
I do have to act my part in it.
I pray that God blesses you with this word. And pray that you ask him where He wants you to put the Gifts that you are giving to him. That might be a church or a ministry or a missionary or any son or daughter, but I would challenge you to put your buck in Gods will. Give to the things God places on your heart.
