Every time I sit down to write a blog, I end up leaving my computer in frustration. What can I say that sums up how I've been feeling at the end of this journey? How can I describe the height, width, depth, and length of the Lord's unending love?
I have been so privileged to spend this year falling in love with Jesus. He's shown me the depths of me while I've pursued the depths of Him. Every day I think I can never truly grasp the indescribable satisfaction in Jesus Christ. Every day my heart has overflowed from His abundance.
There's definitely moments that I can't wait for home. Moments like when I look at the abundant insects floating in my daily hominy & bean soup and debate whether or not I care enough to fish them out. Moments like when I stare at my toes that have been permanently stained dark orange from the African dirt and I remember that I used to get my nails done every week ("City girl" moments is what I call them . . .). Moments like when I'm sleeping in a tiny room filled with bunk beds for 10 women and my mattress is on the floor; and I remember my 3-bedroom San Francisco apartment.
But then there's moments where I get to see a little girl's face light up when she gets to play with other children, knowing that she used to be sexually abused by her father (who is now in jail for it). And moments when I see a formerly malnourished, mute little boy from the local slum chattering to all his Challenge Farm tablemate's in Kiswahili while flinging small bits of ugali at them.
There's moments where I just sit and look at the gorgeous Kenyan landscape and realize how desperately in love I am with Jesus. I'm not the same person I was at the start of the Race, yet I'm more myself and more alive than I've ever been in my life. I didn't know it was possible to feel this way.
I don't have the words to describe everything that's been happening around me or in me this month, but I can say this: The Lord is good and life with Jesus is abundant.
The World Race is ending, but the journey with the Lord is just beginning. He's taking me, all of us, from glory to glory. And that's a promise I can happily hang my hat on.
