"Be stubborn with what God has for you, lay your life down"
Wow. How often do I get side tracked by things in my life? Quite often. I become side tracked with plans after the Race. By what is going on at home. By keeping up with e-mails from the first world. Sometimes I become side tracked by people. I keep forgetting I signed up for a Race of singleness yet all these other things and sometimes people distract me. I have been convicted lately when people ask me on certain topics like…
"Are you sure you heard from the Lord?"
I know the voice of my Lord. I know it so distinctly that I can't even argue some things when I hear them. God always slaps me with hard truth. But really the heart of the matter is… when God instructs me to do something, do I actually do it? Sarah told me it sounds like I go along with what God wants. I'm obedient with what He asks of me in my life. But I don't always do it with a smile on my face. I don't lay my life down when He guides me into something. I just stick my toe in the water and say
:"Okay God, there, happy? I did it" That sounds ridiculous.
Sarah also said "Be stubborn for what He wants"
That would mean fall in love with what His plans are for you.
This is hard. There are certain things in my life that I don't want. I don't want to be around certain people, I don't want to be called to Africa, yet I clearly am, I don't want to be joyful all the time. And really a lot of times I just want to go home. But here I am. I was sent. I was called. I answered. I could do better at this whole missionary thing. I could choose in more than I already do. I could actually try obeying God to the fullest instead of just following half heartedly.
I've been a Jonah. I have completely ran in the opposite direction of what God wants for me. I have had God give me some crazy instructions, that reminds me of being like Noah. People might think I'm crazy but who cares?
2 Corinthians 5:13
"If we are out of our minds it is for God. If we are in our right minds it is for you"
But it's going to take a lot. It's going to mean ending a relationship. It's going to mean being patient. It's going to mean praying for God's will instead of specifics. It's going to mean being all in. Being all in is scary. It means trusting that God's best is really what is best. It means accepting that our ways are not His ways. It means giving up control. It means having faith. We like to spell faith on the World Race R-I-S-K.
I'm ready to lay it down. I'm ready to be stubborn for what He wants from me.
