It is the most expensive house I’ve seen in years and certainly the most expensive to have been inside – definitely not typical world race status. A two story working fountain and an eccentric rainforest mural/stained glass window inside a family mansion all sitting on the sand of one of the deadliest surfing beaches in the world.
Mark and Ingrid moved to Jaco with their family in 1992 to start a restaurant. Upon arrival in this tiny beach town Mark told his wife, “Jaco is like an ice cream shop and I’m going to try every flavor.” He then built his life around other women, a new one every night. He would invite them into his marriage bed and pridefully report to his wife the women that were in her bed the night before. Mark lived the party life; quite possibly even created it in Jaco. He was seen as the “god” of the town and everyone looked up to him because of his lifestyle. He walked around town slandering the name of Jesus and kicking people out of his restaurant if they even breathed the name of God. He ran the restaurant but his real career came in bachelor party rentals. He would rent his ocean front family home out to locals or visitors and provide women for them to party with for days at a time. One year on Christmas, he kicked his wife and children out for two weeks so he could host the party of the year.
Most of the women Mark chose to take on as his mistresses were women who worked at his restaurant. His wife, Ingrid, had remained faithful to their marriage vows and worked at the restaurant with all the women and Mark. She had to face these people every day; a husband who she once trusted and still loved and the women who saw her as dirt. In 2007, Ingrid bravely ceased work at the restaurant because she could not emotionally handle her situation any longer. But Ingrid remained in her house cohabitating with Mark.
For six years Mark would wake up, make a pot of coffee, hand Ingrid her full mug and they wouldn’t see each other until the next morning when the same thing happened. Mark would wake up, make a pot of coffee, hand Ingrid her full mug and leave for the day. For six years a husband and wife would see each other every day and never say a word. For six years a wife would look at her husband and not even know who was standing in front of her. For six years a husband would love his wife enough to make sure she had her coffee but not enough that he would apologize for all the pain he put her through. For six years they lived together but neither really lived at all.
Mark was diagnosed with cancer in 2012. He had no one to take care of him; the women he entertained didn’t want to do his dirty work, his parents were in the states, he had betrayed his wife and children. Ingrid, the gracious, loving wife that she is stepped up and cared for her husband who she hadn’t spoken to in six years. She pushed all the hurt and loneliness aside and sat by the bedside of her dying spouse.
Two months before his death, Mark heard the good news about Jesus Christ and accepted Him into his heart. Mark gave up his pride and gained his freedom in the Lord. Now Mark is peacefully in Heaven because Jesus took his sin away. None of his past matters to the Lord because he said, “Yes, Jesus, I want to know you. I am a sinner and I don’t deserve your love but I get it anyway because you are beyond amazing. I don’t want to be a sinner anymore, forgive me.” All of the people that Mark had influenced in his life: men that he partied with, women who he idled and used were all present at his funeral where the gospel was preached. How beautiful that even through a story as dark and sinful as Mark’s God was glorified.
Two weeks after his death I arrived in Jaco and had the wonderful opportunity to share God’s love with Ingrid. We helped her with cleaning and moving out of the house where she wasn’t even allowed to pick out her own couch. Ingrid has a lot of healing left in her life but she is learning more every day about how God sees her and Jaco is full of people who want to love her like Jesus loves her without wanting anything in return.
It was hard for me to fathom anyone existing and living like Mark lived most of his life but he was not the only one. There are husbands and brothers and fathers like him all over the world and Jesus is waiting to save them just like He saved Mark. I can only hope that they say yes to Him and experience the love and grace that Jesus died on the cross for. Jesus didn’t experience all the pain and suffering in the crucifixion for nothing; He died for us – for Mark, for Ingrid, for me, for you.
-C
