I am leaving for the airport tonight at 11:30 and am leaving for the nations TOMORROW! We have a very early flight so we are crashing at the airport since the shuttles from the hotel don’t run that early. Night one of weird sleeping arrangements!
I can’t even describe my feelings right now. Excited, nervous, anxious, overjoyed, ecstatic, sad, happy. Everything.
Two words that stick out to me right now are unprepared and simplify.
Unprepared: I feel totally unprepared. Do I know enough? Will I know what to say to these people? What if I’m asked to do something that I don’t know how to do or that I’m not comfortable with? Who am I to do the task that is placed in front of me? God has already done some unbelievable things at launch. At one of the sessions earlier today, someone came up to me and asked for my arm. He pulled out a sharpie and told me that he felt God telling him a word for me. He then wrote ‘abundance’. He told me that he wanted me to pray about that word and let God show me what exactly it would mean. He then went on to tell me that he wanted me to live in God’s abundance this year, that I should live in God’s love and let that flow from me and lead me as I do ministry. I couldn’t believe that he was telling me that. It was a total God thing. That’s what I needed to hear. I finally got my answers. I don’t know enough. I won’t know what to say sometimes. I might not know what to do or feel comfortable with it. I am no one. But that’s all okay. God knows enough. God knows what to say. God knows what to do and he will definitely be calling me out of my comfort zone. He is someone. A speaker at one of the sessions said this about the Lord: “The power to do great things is already inside of you because I’m inside of you.” He has brought me this far without me screwing up bad enough that AIM has told me to pack my bags and hop a flight back to Indiana! So yes, I am unprepared and yet I am fully equipped and ready to handle whatever is thrown at me this coming year. He has gone before me and paved the way. All I have to do is follow and live in his abundance.
Simplify: I am sure beyond a doubt now that I am being called to simplify my life. That is going to be a challenge for me, but my teammates and I have talked about this. We all feel this way and therefore we can help each other. That means not logging onto facebook every time we have wifi. Not calling home every chance we get. And not sitting in the corner alone texting our friends back in the states. We have all come on this race ready to let go and be present wherever we are. Yes, I will still have my phone and will text and keep in contact with people. Yes, I will have my computer (actually my brother’s, thanks Daniel). Yes, I will post on facebook and instagram (#dreadheadtravels and/or #LivetheAdventure) so everyone can follow my journey. And yes, I will be updating this blog. But I will not be doing any of that very frequently. Instead, I am going to go out with my team and enjoy where we are and build relationships with those around us. We will go play soccer with the local kids when they get a game going (I cannot wait to show them my awesome skills;) ), connecting with each other during extra team bonding, or any other opportunities we might have in each country and ministry site. After all, how can we build the kingdom around the world if our only focus is back with friends and family in the states?
There has already been so much happening here at launch and I know that it is just the start of an absolutely amazing journey we are about to embark on. It will be a year full of laughter, tears, joy, love, kindness, frustration, and most of all Jesus. I have already seen him working in my squadmates and even more so in my teammates. I’m so excited to watch that continue as we travel together around this world.
During worship the other night, someone said, “This is just one year, so why not jump in full force and live it to the fullest and see what God can do?” He’s right. It’s one year and I plan to make the most of it.
I already miss everyone back home. But as one of my best friends said to me, “You aren’t missing out here, you are experiencing there.” How true is that?? This might be a once in a lifetime opportunity. I am going to experience it.
I plan to simplify my life. I plan to let God lead me so that I may have the words to say. I plan to live this year with nothing holding me back. I plan to be present. I plan to help change the world.
Thank you to everyone for helping me get to this moment. Thank you for the financial support, the prayers for my squad and me, and for encouraging me along the way. Mama and Daddy an extra special thank you for all you have done. For doing everything you can to help me reach all of my goals. For driving a ridiculous number of miles and hours for me. For coming to launch to get a little taste of what this is all about. For watching my pup for me while I’m gone (it’s totally fine with me if you cave and let him sleep in your bed). I love you and will miss you but I’ll see you soon!
It’s the night before the nations. Ready or not, we are leaving for our World Race. First stop, Haiti. See you in 11 months America! 🙂
