The Day of the Songbird
It all started while doing administrative work in the India Christian Ministries office. We were listening to Christian music while sorting files and creating labels for children's xrays. I started to sing along to one of the songs. One of the other volunteers we were working with said, "Christel, you have the voice of a bird"
The day of the Songbird
Before she told me that, I was wrestling with a few different thoughts in regards to music and singing. First off, I have been really missing having music playing all the time around me. In my life at home or volunteering with YE or in Kentucky I was always able to have music on while driving, while in my room or while working. Music has always been a part of my every day life. This year it isn't. I can't just have music playing in the background at any given moment.
When that music was playing while we were doing administrative work, immediately my body completely relaxed. I was so happy. I said to God, "I just wish I could have music playing all the time".
Switch over to another one of my thoughts for these past weeks. I have not been really comfortable freely singing around people. This may sound crazy because I love to sing and have been trained to do that. However, I have been believing a lie that says "If you sing, you will just be showing off and so people will get jealous or frusterated with you. Don't freely sing". I have been believing that and so I have been acting on that. (We act out the things in life that we believe regardless if they are the truth or not).
So, immediately when that other missionary told me that my voice sounded like a bird, I started to sing more freely with the other songs.
A few hours later, we drove to the orphanage where we work and I was really wishing I had music with me. Then God placed a song in my head and I started to sing in my head. Immediately, my body relaxed as if real music was playing on the radio.
Once we got to the orphange, I started singing songs freely over my child and other children in the orphange. As I was doing that, God told me to pray for my child. However, I wasn't to just speak out my prayer, but i was to sing my prayer.
That was the first time I ever SANG MY PRAYERS.
WOW, It was the best connection with God that I have ever had. It was so peaceful and real and emotional. Singing is the best way I can get in touch with my emotions and so it made sense that God would lead me to pray in that way. (side note: I absolutely love creating melodies for songs, but don't like writing lyrics. So singing my prayers allows me to have the freedom of not working about my words, but enjoy so much the creative aspect of creating melodies)
Later in the evening, I was sharing all of this with my team and my team leader gave me a word from God. She said that God wanted me to know that singing should be as natural as speaking.
After that conversation, I went to the roof of our building and I just sang out my prayers for the day over the streets of India. It was so comforting. After doing that for awhile and praying for another teammate on the roof, I went to brush my teeth off the side of the building. As I looked out at the apartments near us, I saw a woman sleeping outside on a bed covered in a sheet. God told me to pray for her.
My immediate response was "no, I don't want to go down four flights of stairs and go over to her and pray for her. I am not even able to go and do that alone". But then I told God I would. Once I said "yes", he just told me to walk down one flight of stairs and pray for her. I started to sing/pray for her outloud. Then at some point i stopped praying out loud,but continued to sing my prayer in my head.
PEACE. I can't describe it in any other way. But when I sang my prayers to God in my head, I was just consumed with peace. Every piece from the day came together at that point. Wanting comfort from music. Getting it from singing songs in my head. Breaking chains of the lies of what my singing would mean to others. Singing at the orphanage. Singing my prayers to my child. Learning that singing is the same as speaking. Singing prayers on the roof. Walking in obedience in praying for that woman. Learning that singing my prayers in my head brings me so much peace.
God is crazy. That is all I have to say. I had no idea that this day would bring all of these things. It just shows me yet again that when we are open to His works and walk confidently and boldly in the things He has for us, then we will continue to receive more and more freedom.
That's all I have for you all today. Songbird out for the evening. 🙂
