RWANDA | Kanombe
“What are you doing right now that requires faith?”
This is one of the questions that Francis Chan proposes in his book
Crazy Love, and has been one that has challenged my life over the past
week. When we arrived in Rwanda, it was told to me by our Team Leader, Tim,
that we would be “giving a word” (a.k.a. preaching) at the church
services. Two of us each night would do this, one would be more like a short
testimony and the other more like a sermon. I was absolutely petrified at the
thought of this. It was a big deal when I started sharing with my team
what God was doing in my life, and now I had to tell an entire congregation?
The thought of it all seemed nearly impossible.
The first night that we had to speak I nervously volunteered myself for the
shorter speak, thinking that I could just give my general testimony. I quickly
got up told it and shortly after finished and sat down. It was pretty painless,
but I had also told that story countless times in the months prior to me
leaving. That night, we sat there with some of the youth from the choir who had
escorted us home. One of the boys, Fergi, as we like to call him, had been
talking about the dancing that they do in the church. We asked if they ever get
tired. He said “Tonight I was very tired in the middle of dancing, but
then I just asked the Holy Spirit to help me.” Wow! This fifteen year-old
boy had reminded me that it is not me but it is God. That night I read Francis
Chan’s question about what we were doing that required faith. I realized that
one I need to put me out of my comfort zone and two when I do; God is going to
be there to catch me.
The next day, I decided to give the big sermon. I knew that it was not me
but it was God, so why should I be nervous. Its funny when you think about life
in this way, it changes everything. It is no longer I, but God. I want to live
a life that requires faith. I no longer want to live a life that would still be
ok if God wasn’t in it. I want to wake up every morning and know that I would
not survive without my faith that God would be there.
Sometimes I wonder what this will look like when I return home. If God will
call me to full time missions or if he will tell me to give up everything I own
and give it all to the poor. I can’t say right now what God has in store for my
life in 6 months, but I do know that I want a life that is fully committed to
God and not me. I want to live a life outside of my comfort zone and outside
the norms of the world. Where will this take me…? I don’t know, but if I have
God I guess it really doesn’t matter!
