You are still God…
We grow up hearing the stories of water being turned into wine, of bread and fish being multiplied, of sight being returned to the blind, the mute speaking, the sea parting so men can walk on dry land, God speaking through a brining bush, and the dead being raised. Yet that is what it is to us a lot of time, just stories. At what point did God’s word, did fact become fiction? When did these real things become just stories from so long ago?, when did we decide that these things no longer happened?
If you would have asked me even a couple months ago if I believed that those same miracles happened today, I would have said “yes.” Although I would have said yes” you wouldn’t have necessarily found me praying for those things, and if you did there was more doubt in my mind than faith. Over these past months I have struggled with seeing my growth. I mean I knew I had changed since going on the race. I know I am not the same person I was. Just for some reason I was struggling to see what and how much had changed in me.
Over this past week God was truly able to let me see my spiritual growth. It was through the death of Anthony Cadena , one of our amazing youth we have gotten to know here in Nicaragua this month. When it was told to be that he was last seen in the ocean and it was assumed that he had drowned, I immediately began to pray. As I began to pray I found myself praying for things that I would have never asked God for before this season of my life. I was just asking but truly believed/believe that God could/can make them happen.
I remember getting really frusterated the day after Anthony had gone missing. I was on the stage of the church just chatting and out of the blue I was like I haven’t asked God for rain yet this month. God had given me rain a couple other times on the race as a reminder to me so why not now? Well, some people heard me say I was asking for rain, and others throughout the day would ask me what I was thinking about so I would tell them I was praying for rain. Some people thought it was silly, or didn’t understand, several told me it was impossible, others were concerned that if it rained Anthony would not be found. Even with all that I continued to pray for rain. I continued to pray for Anthony. I continued to pray for this community of Candelaria. I asked God if he could please just give me rain if it was his will for my team to stay in Nicaragua, if he wasn’t done using Anthony’s life, and if he wasn’t done with using my team here.
You see April is the hottest and driest month of the year here in Nicaragua. Plus I happen to also be living in the driest and hottest part of the country. So the idea of rain at the time did seem impossible even to me. The awesome thing is though, we serve a Big God. One that is so much bigger than climate or weather, location, or human worries. That night as I fell to sleep I was awaken by my team mates, because it was raining. What others told be was impossible God made possible. It was at that moment as I was sitting by our front door watching the rain pour down that I realized how big our God is. That he is not a God of limitations. That he is a God of the Impossible. He is not a God that we ask for one thing and our request returns void. He knows our needs, wants, and desires and acts upon them.
Anthony was found the next morning. I continued to pray and believe for a miracle. Anthony was not raised from the dead that day, but I know that life has come from his death, that he is bringing life to this community. That God is going to continue to use this young man’s life to transform the community. This community is so thirsty for living water and God is pouring it out on them.
I have truly never prayed for anything with such faith or asked God so boldly for anything before. Sure I’ve questioned the things that I prayed over those days or why thing didn’t turn out how I thought that they should have. The thing is though, the God that I serve doesn’t need me to understand him or his motives. All I can tell you is that I now have a new faith. A faith in a God who CAN do the IMPOSSIBLE. I now pray with a new boldness and know that God will not return back void. He is the same God who has always been and will always be. He is a God of Miracles. He is a God of Mystery. He is a God of the Impossible. He still heals the sick, gives sight to the blind, speaks to us, and raises the dead.
I know that some may read this and think I am crazy, but I really don’t care. II know who I am, and I know who I serve. I know who and where my contentment is. I know what I have been called to. God has not called me into timidity, but into boldness. I find so much joy, and comfort just knowing that I am in God’s hands, that my GOD is still GOD. That my God DOES the IMPOSSIBLE.
Thanks you all so much for your prayers, Love and Support. After much praying this entire past month my team has felt lead to stay here in Nicaragua another month instead of heading to El Salvador with the rest of our squad. Thank you to AIM, The World Race, our squadleaders, and our squad for all your prayers and support. Please continue to pray for the Cadena’s (anthony’s family), and the community of Candelaria. If you would like to in any way financially contriube to 16 year old Anthonys funeral expenses please contact me for more information. Please also just pray that God will continue to use us and show us what he wants from us this month as we continue to build relationships with the people here.
