(I first want to preface this blog in saying that despite comments I make referring to my childhood I do not regret anything I have been taught. I am thankful for every lesson and see them all as a good thing. Now I am just learning others have grown up differently and I must learn the differences. So this is about how I am learning the differences.)
Most of team TAE running the first Mish 5K (Photo credit: Emily Molloy)
As I was thinking about what to write for my next blog, I was reminded of Forrest Gump. In the movie, Forrest had chains on his legs. He had identified himself as a boy with chains, unable to keep up with his peers. He grew up with this belief, and in many ways this belief was true. However, in the movie he is encouraged by “his love” Jenny to ignore the negative words spoken about them. She acknowledged his chains, but did not judge him by his chains. She encouraged him to run despite of them.
The Lord is very similar. So often we can find ourselves wrapped up in chains, identified by chains, believing they are a definite. This belief can blind us from the truth that there can be another way. We may believe they will never fall off, not because they are bad, but because they have always been there and we are destined to have them forever. Forrest believed he could only walk. But like Jennie, God encourages us to run. There are times when God breaks chains immediately, but there are others when He wants us to run, and in our running the chains will fall off.
Hebrews 12:1 "Therefore since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us."
Like Forrest, I have/had some chains in my life. I have been aware of some of these chains for a long time. They are chains on my heart. I have ignored the chains in part because I have believed I was destined for them. It is how I grew up, and what I believed was correct. However these chains have hindered relationships and become barriers in understanding others.
I have been living with the same 5 people for almost 6 months. I have learned that understanding each other is crucial, communicating is crucial, and compromising is crucial. We are all different. We come from different backgrounds with different customs.
Some of these chains I have noticed are due to things I have grown up believing.
The first chain is anxiety.
“A penny saved, a penny earned,” as my great-grandmother would say.
Like Forrest I have grown up with a structure of how to spend and save money. I have been taught about investing; I have been taught how to be content without buying whatever I want and have learned self-control. However, this at times creates anxiety in my heart. The structure and the lesson is a good thing, but when it begins to create something not of the Lord, something needs to be broken. So this is an area that I have begun to walk in during the past few months. I am learning that it is okay to ‘treat’ myself to things every once in a while. God has always provided for me and has always graciously and abundantly given to me; there is no reason to doubt or fear His faithfulness. And this year especially,as I witness people with very little giving more than they can afford and in the end God providing for them.
The second chain is impatience.
“Do not put off for tomorrow what you can do today” another saying my great-grandmother loved.
I have grown up with the habit of doing something as soon as possible. An example is doing dishes directly after finishing a meal. Many of my teammates did not grow up this way. On most occasions I am the first one to clean up and I have resented my teammates for it. I have falsely perceived them as being lazy and inconsiderate. And I have been guilty of impatience and anger. Through open and honest communication we have been able to work on these issues together. And again I am walking in this freedom. I am learning to relax and trust my team to be the adults that they are. I am learning that I do not have to do all the chores, and they do not always have to be done immediately. I am also learning a lot about being patient and gracious towards them.
The third chain is a lack of trust.
“Waste not, want not” yet another saying handed down from my great-grandmother. (She is full of wisdom! I am not denying that)
In my house growing up we did not waste anything. An example is that there were only two boxes of cereal open at one time. We did not open another until one was gone. On my team there are 6 of us and there is a possibility that all the boxes of cereal may be open at one time. However, it is different when we are eating cereal every day and knowing that they will all be eaten. I am learning to run in peace when I see so many things open at one time,and trust that my team will not be wasteful either.
Team TAE after our 5K. We are all free! (Photo Credit: Emily Molloy)
I am excited to be running and allowing the Lord to remove the chains. I desire to be a woman of peace, of patience, of generosity, of humility, of diligence, of trust, of wisdom and fully in love with the Lord. And I believe everyday, as I continue to run, I will continue to be more of the woman that both the Lord and I desire.
