Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.
Hebrews 12:1-2
I am reminded of this verse on a constant basis. It comes down to a choice. Will I or will I not pick up my cross and keep running the race? That is the internal struggle I have often. I don’t always say yes, but in those times I hear God say, “I have faith in you”.
It’s not always easy saying yes. Often it takes all I have. But I’m continually reminded it comes down to a choice, a choice God believes I can make. Can I believe it? That’s the battle. God waits for me to make a choice. Will I choose him? Will I choose faith? Choosing faith also means I choose to believe in myself. Will I choose to believe in myself? Too often I don’t, and shame and fear is right there with me. And again God says, “I believe in you”.
If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all- how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died- more than that, was raised to life- is at the right hand of God and also is interceding for us.
Romans 8:31-34
The World Race is breaking me. It becomes harder to say yes to a positive attitude, to hope, joy, and thankfulness as the days bring more and more challenges. God tells me daily, “Love these people”. These people are my squad mates, my teammates, my ministry contacts, and the people I am ministering to. After five months, I start asking God, “Why? I don’t have anything left to give?” God says, “It’s your choice, and I believe in you”. The words bring tears to my eyes. I feel empty and broken. Every month I have to leave the people I’ve been pouring my life into and then start the process over. I experience team changes, rejection, and a lack of expectations being met, and often I am reminded of my weaknesses. It’s hard not letting bitterness win, but God says he believes in me.
God tells me that I am joyful, fun, loving, and compassionate. He tells me that I am shameless, free, confident, and his son, that I am not alone and not a victim. Too easily lies slip in, and I stop trusting the truth of what God says about me. Even in my brokenness God sees the good. He still believes in me in the midst of my brokenness when all I see is the bad. In moments like these, God is teaching me to live by the truth and not by how I feel. God wants me to make a choice, a choice to draw nearer to him in the midst of him refining me. He wants me to embrace my brokenness, to rejoice in the process because he is doing a good work in me. He wants me to choose love, hope, and gladness because that is who he is, and that is what he desires for me.
In every moment we choose our attitudes and beliefs about our circumstances, and how we will react to them. We have a God who is for us in every decision we make even when we make the wrong one time and time again. He is patient with us and delights in us in the process. He delights in us no matter what the circumstance. I want to encourage those reading to be glad in your brokenness on the day it comes, because God delights in you always. God does amazing things with and through our brokenness when we give it up to him.
