There is a passage in 1 Samuel 14 that God has long spoken to me out of. It’s the story of Jonathan (the son of the King) and his armor bearer. The two of them take this mighty risk and attack a group of troops by whom they are far outnumbered. To get there, they have to climb up a ridge. A cliff stood on either side. One side was called Bozez, which means ‘shining’ and the other side was called Seneh, which means ‘thorny’. They climb up on a wholehearted whim, and Jonathan says ‘Perhaps the Lord will work on our behalf.’
The end of the story is that God tears up shop.
In my own story, this decision seems both shining and thorny. Some parts of it seem amazing and glorious and romantic (in the adventure sort of way): seeing distant lands and places I have only heard about, entering into worship with other cultures, playing with children of the nations. Other parts seem completely scary or just undesirable. I really do like sleeping in a bed and drinking coffee each morning. I love my family, my friends, and my coworkers. Leaving it all behind for a year seems thorny. Committing to a group of complete strangers to eat, sleep, breathe, live with for a year seems thorny.
But perhaps the Lord would work on our behalf.
This week was training in GA. It’s given me a better picture of what this year is going to look like. We ate strange foods, exercised, tossed some frisbee, built team, laughed, cried, snotted, did push ups, declared the truth, learned, embarrassed ourselves, slept outside, cooked chicken over a fire, hugged, and danced. The week was exhausting physically, emotionally, spiritually… but it has really confirmed in my heart all the more that this is exactly where I am supposed to be and exactly what I am supposed to be doing.
I am ready to ask God for big things this year and to wait on Him. Perhaps, just perhaps, He will work on our behalf.
