this month has been stretching me in ways that I thought I would encounter further
along in the Race, but praise the Lord, He’s not wasting any time jumping into
the deep-end with me J
This month in the Philippines has been both wonderful and challenging in
many ways. There is so much freedom in ministry here at KIM, so we are left to
really seek God in asking Him, “what do you want me to do today Lord?” This is
both a blessing and a difficulty for me. . As a teacher, I love lists, and I love checking off the things I
accomplish on those lists.
Honestly, I discovered that with
this freedom I have a part of me that wants to be comfortable and only do
ministry that “sounds fun” or is easier. However, with this freedom we also
have the unique opportunity of truly ministering in areas of true passion that
the Lord has put within each of us World Racers. For example, I have an
opportunity to love on middle school girls for biblestudy which is a HUGE passion
of mine. As I’ve gone through this month of ministry…I realize that God has
been teaching me A LOT about the unique Freedom He offers…
As I learn, He has been uncomfortably uncovering my expectations for this
coming year of missions.
Without even realizing it, I came with expectations…
- That I can “do” enough ministry to somehow prove my worth in Him
- That I can “do” enough incredible things that my friends, supporters, and
family are proud of me back home - That I always be busy “doing” everything I can that a good missionary should
be “doing” especially as a World Racer!
ARE YOU SEEING A PATTERN?? Well, I did….I realized that I’ve been trying
to live out of what I can “do” for God, my supporters, AIM, and the
Philippines…wow was that a hard heart-check for me! God had to firmly remind
me, “No Carly, you didn’t come on the Race to “do” anything to earn my love…or
your worth in me….it is already established that I LOVE YOU UNCONDITIONALLY,
despite what you “do” this year or EVER. You are worth my ultimate love- My Son’s
life….YOUR WORTH IS NOT DETERMINED BY WHAT YOU DO!” Whew, so once that
actually sunk in, which took a few weeks lets be honest, I am realizing the
incredible freedom I get to live in…really realizing this truth, God does not
“expect” me to do anything but LOVE HIM…be in constant Communion and
Conversation with Him, when I do that, I see His kingdom on earth and
incredible things happen!
month is much closer to real life than I expected the Race to be. In real life,
I do not get ministry handed to me on a silver platter all the time, I have to
learn how to bring the kingdom through simply living it. Daily. In Ashland, In
Manila, In Cambodia…wherever, I’m so grateful that this is no longer a
year-long mission trip to me, this is MY LIFE.
take baby Jason to Operation Smile so that could be screened to have
surgery on his Cleft Pallet. Bourbon was directing traffic, after we
spent about 30 min driving around lost, unable to find the hospital, we
ask Bourbon for directions twice, the second time he offers to hop in
our car and take us directly there. Thank Jesus!! He got us there and
was a wonderful blessing to us for the day!!
W
