Who am I?
I am a mess. A vulnerable, selfish, vain mess that is head-strong and wilful. I let fear of vulnerability prevent me for reaching out. I think I have everything figured out. I follow the world like it is the next best thing. I try to stay ahead of the tends, try to be a leader no one wants. Never content with what I have, always looking at the person next to me thinking, “Wow, hers looks so much better than mine.” Fighting for attention, then scorning it when it came. Coveting, manipulating, lying, cheating, selfish, selfish, selfish…
I’ve seen the depths of this heart, and I know the depravity that I am capable of.
And yet he loves me the same.
This God who saves, saved me.
He’s now showing me aspects of himself. Stirring up my heart for things that stir his.
Things like family, people, their stories, nature, dogs, dancing, singing, drawing, history, work, laughter, honesty, vulnerability, healing, friendship, making old things new, parades, Adventures in Odyssey, sparkly things, dressing up, crafts, reading, the seasons (especially winter), piano, Ticket to Ride, sleep, Lord of the Rings, budgeting, thrift store shopping, cozy blankets… the list is ever growing.
Making my heart new.
God is now taking me out of my comfort zone. This will in no way, shape or form be easy. I’m learning that nothing with Him ever is. I’m a mess. But He is good. He will change me, stretch me, mould me, and break my heart for the things that break his.
Please pray for me as I take this great step of faith. May God be glorified.
If you would like to support me financially on this journey, please click the “Support Me!” button near the top of this page. Your donations are soo appreciated.
If you would like to stay in contact with me, please leave a comment or send me an email at[email protected]. I would LOVE to hear from you! May God bless you richly.
