Tharros is Greek for courage. Team Courage. The name is so fitting yet does not fit me at all. I am a simple, normal girl. I like to have my own way, I drive too fast and forget to change my oil, and I have Toby Keith’s “Red Solo Cup” stuck in my head. How can God be asking me to leave everything that is comfortable for 11 months and rely on Him every single day? I have so many flaws. Want to know a secret? I am not courageous at all.
I am afraid of so many things. I am afraid of what people will think of me. I am afraid of being hurt. I am afraid of not knowing what to do. I am afraid of not being enough. I am afraid of asking for help. But most of all I am afraid of failure.
Fear has frozen me for so long and has kept me from so many things. It has kept me awake through the night and has churned my stomach for hours. Sometimes my fear has more control in my life than my faith in God. It controls me…in so many ways. It is an idol. I have not given myself a chance to fail, and it is exhausting.
Father, help me let go of my fear so that I can hold on to you with both hands. Lord, help me to fear only you.
Team Courage. The courage that God will place in the void my fear has created, His strength that will have power in my weakness.
