"You called me out upon the water…the great unknown, where feet may fail…”
When I first heard about the race…a fire was ignited deep inside of me. A passion to do something that mattered…something that would bring a purpose to my life, as what I was and who I’d become, wasn’t anything I ever wanted to be a part of. 11 Countries…11 Months. When you sit back and really think about it…that is a terrifying commitment. I didn’t spend time thinking about the World Race before I was filling out the application form. Like Peter in Matthew 14, I saw the Lord approaching, walking on water, and asked him to call me out to be with him.
Like Peter, in the boat in the middle of the sea, all I wanted…all I craved, all I needed was to be with the Lord. So, He called.
I imagine a wide grin spreading upon Peters face…I imagine him scrambling over the edge, eyes fixed on Jesus, and nothing else. I imagine his toes hitting the top of the water, finding solid ground…completely in awe of Jesus and His Majesty.
The application process was very similar for me. I was lost, in the middle of the sea, desperate for a life change…when Jesus showed up. I saw Him at a distance…I saw His arm, outstretched toward me…and I scrambled out of the boat to be with Him…feet unfailing, I interviewed…I was accepted…I stepped toward Jesus, confident that the sea under my feet was nothing more than the land they are so accustomed to.
“And there I find You in the mystery…In oceans deep, My faith will stand”
I often wonder if Peter’s feet were even wet as he walked further and further toward Jesus. I like to imagine that they weren’t…that his love for the Lord literally repelled every single consequence of walking on water that day.
Then the wind came, for Peter… and the reality of the race happened to hit me. My eyes went from the Lord, to launch…to falling 120ft…to my dad getting cancer…to an extremely difficult team…my eyes went from being fixated on the Lord…to my circumstances surrounding me. When the wind blew around Peter I can imagine his fear…I can imagine his heart rate beginning to quicken…his breathing to become more rapid. It was the same fear I had when the race got rough. My focus went from being 100% on the Lord, to 100% on my surroundings and circumstances. I began to sink. The ground beneath my feet was gone…and I was about to be overcome by my own selfishness, pride, and fear.
Every single time I began to sink…I felt his strong hand around my arm…holding me above the water. He held my head above the water long enough for me to realize, that He was still standing.
"Your grace abounds in deepest waters…Your sovereign hand will be my guide. Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me…You've never failed and You won't start now”
Without fail, the Lord has held me above the water with Him. When this race seemed unbearable…He picked me up and got me back on my feet. Every time He held me close, I felt him chuckle and ask : “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” as He wiped the tears out of my eyes. So, as I sit here…I realize that again that as I go home in 4 days, I have two choices. First, to think about the unknown I’m about to step into…to sink into the sea of fear and doubt. Or, I could fix my eyes on Jesus…I could go home, so in love and in tune with His desires, that not a drop of water soaks gets in my way…
And personally, I’m praying for the latter.
See you all soon.
