When I graduated from college, I had a plan. Some graduates plan on traveling while others seek to further their education. I decided that when I graduated from college, I was going to move home and find a “big boy” job. And that’s exactly what I did. The following August when my other friends were either beginning their first semester of graduate school or returning home from a summer of sight-seeing, I checked in for my first day of career work. And so would be the case for the next 10 months.
Life in the real world was pretty cool. I’ll admit that. For the first time ever, my bank account wasn’t teetering on the edge of overdraft fees – a new experience for me coming out of college. My wardrobe gained some volume, I could finally buy groceries that didn’t reflect the life of a professional video gamer and instead of drooling over the toys I had dreamed about for the past four years, I began making real purchases. I moved out of my parent’s house to get closer to the city because that’s where all the young, good-looking (not that I’m good looking, I’m referencing the people I saw there) professionals live. In my mind, I was making it happen. My life, as I perceived it, was on track for a future filled with success.
But that’s the problem. I was living as if it were really “my” life. I mean after all, I know best. Right? It was me who landed the job. I passed the pre-employment tests. I’m the one who said the right things during my interview. It was my money – I was earning it. I was making the decisions on how to spend it. I deserved nice things because I was young and single and I worked hard. And even though I would complain about my job and the restraints on progression, I never did anything to change it. Heck, I even got more involved with my church – a validation for any sense of flailing prioritization. But that was all OK because I had it under control. Remember, I know best.
I can be such an idiot sometimes…
Needless to say, God caught on.
So came the point where even with everything I “had,” I felt like I had nothing. Typical. My job all of a sudden wasn’t good enough. Neither was all my stuff. I wanted better. I deserved better. That’s really what I thought. But God put an end to it all. He was having no part. And so He would smite me with one of the most humbling experiences of my life.
In the matter of a week, God stripped it all away. An overwhelming decision that my job was not the right path channeled into an abrupt departure. With the job, so went the paychecks and benefits. Along with that went the routine, schedule and purpose. One morning I woke up, filled my coffee mug and rode my bike to work. That same day, I rode my bike home never to return. I wouldn’t wake up the next morning to go in to work. In fact, I wouldn’t go anywhere – I had no clue what to do.
All of a sudden, I was lost. Absolutely and utterly lost. It was like being in a foreign country with no map, translation dictionary or Internet access. I didn’t know what to do with myself. It was an eerie and uncomfortable feeling but it’s exactly what God wanted.
During that time, my intentions started to transform. I couldn’t be distracted with things anymore because I didn’t have money to readily buy things. My days were now completely open so I could devote time to reading, reflecting and writing. I wasn’t tired in the evenings so I could start investing more time into relationships and people. I could read my bible now. I could listen to sermons whenever I wanted. I could write about God and how He was moving in my life. I could pray – really, honestly pray. It was weird. It was good. It was revival.
My relationship with God was exploding. Whatever I had considered it to be before was a murky pit compared to how I was discovering God’s truth and love now. I was talking to God, relying on God and trusting God when I had nothing. It was exactly what He had intended. He took it all away because He had to in order to truly get to my heart. I wasn’t giving Him the attention He deserved with the life I created for myself so He tore it all down to redirect my heart. I understand that better now.
I was out of work for nearly three months that summer. During that time, I drew closer to God and spent more time filling my cup with His glory and faithfulness than I ever had before. To date, those few months served as the biggest spiritual trial of my life thus far. In what seemed to be a devastating blow to my hard work and success, God revealed unmatched clarity, hope and wisdom. He also revealed a promise.
After a while, it was time to start making moves again. My savings account had taken a steady hit without any form of income. I was getting stir crazy without a job. I loved where I was at spiritually and valued my time with God but it was time to reestablish a working life. After all, I needed a job and money to survive. But God was smarter than that. He wasn’t just going to plop a new job in my lap because I had reflected faith in Him during my time off. Why would He? The point wasn’t to go back into the life He had recently stripped me from. No way. There were bigger plans. Plans that I never saw coming.
I heard about the World Race for the first time during the summer at a bible study I attended. I was still out of work at the time. A long-time friend of mine had just returned and was sharing his experience with our group. During his conversation, I noted the name of his adventure, “The World Race,” in my iPhone so that I could remember to look it up when I got home. Later that night , I did just that. And the rest is history. In order to save some time, if you’re even still reading this, God obviously impanted the calling for me to particpate in the World Race during the weeks to follow. So after a lot of prayer and direction, I accepted. But, I still needed a job. I wasn’t leaving for another 10 months, after all. So I asked God. I prayed for a job. I said to Him, “Lord, you know my situation and if You provide me with a job, I promise it will be a means to an end and nothing more and that I will carry out your calling to commit to the World Race.” I wanted to be clear that my intentions for work were nothing more than a lifeline to keep me financially stable and busy, all the while knowing I would be definitely leaving come July. I wanted God to know my intentions, clearly. A new job wouldn’t mean new things, pride or any of the corruptive elements that tainted my old life. I would use my new job to glorify Him, tithe and serve. I wasn’t bartering with God – I know better than that; I was dedicating myself to God and acknowledging His power to provide. Even if it was a dream job, I was going to follow Him and His plans – not my own. I want to be very clear about that. A few days after my prayer, I landed another job – and a good one at that. The day I got the job, I deposited my $150 to lock in my World Race spot and it was done.
So now I’m working again. I have a routine. I have a schedule. I have money. But, I’m living my life in a completely different way. This job is not my own, it’s Gods. And it’s an opportunity to reflect Him. What I don’t have is a passport – yet. I’ve only been on a plane once and I’m at a spot in my life that I'm happy with. Nothing about my life screams missionary. Nothing. But that’s what makes God so much greater. He’s bigger than the facts. In July, I’ll be leaving this job. I’ll be leaving my stuff – again. And all of that scares me. But I’ve seen God provide and I’ve seen Him fulfill His promises time and time again. He’s worthy, He’s true and I can’t wait to serve, under His glory, the nations of the world. God knows best, not me, and it’s always going to be that way. This is my World Race testimony. I hope it blesses you.
