Throughout the Bible, the people of God built
memorials. They would build them to give honor and glory to God for what He had
done. They did it as a remembrance, so that as they moved forward, they could
look back in thankfulness. In Vietnam, I felt really impressed by the Lord to
look back on my year with Him and build a memorial to each month. I don’t think
I had any idea to what length he had changed me until I did it. My memorials to
Him have to do with how He moved in my life, and he did use ministry and my
team to solidify His work. The memorials are to what God did in and through me,
and to give him all the glory. I am changed not because I’ve done all these
amazing things to be different, I am changed because He has done it and I’ve
received His love for me. Jesus, here is my heart.
My Memorials to You
Ireland: You started breaking me of myself. It wasn’t a fun experience, but if you
didn’t shower me with your grace during that time, I would have missed your
true love for me. You broke me of my need for attention and intimacy that was
counterfeit. You taught me that
I’m wanted and worthy of your love and call. Getting delivered in Coleraine,
was just one of the pieces of the puzzle of my restored heart, and I was never
the same after that.
Moldova: I went crazy nuts with reading that
month and soaking up knowledge. I was just eager to sit quietly and soak up
whatever I could about you. I didn’t know quite what to do with it all, but I
loved pulling away to discipline myself in that way.
Hungary: My desire for holiness and righteous was huge, and I will
always remember that month being powerful. I know you broke down walls I had
put up, and I became even more transparent and willing to share my struggles.
You taught me to step out and trust you to be faithful to me as I confessed my
sins and struggles. I began to believe that I could really walk in purity with
your life changing power.
Turkey: You began awakening my desire to tell
others about you, and started awakening my heart more and more to the spiritual
realm. You started showing me how you were redeeming my relationships with men.
I began to trust you to protect and guard my heart. Doing that film project, was one way that you were growing
my heart of compassion for your people, and giving me boldness. You were giving me a heart to worship
and just be at a place of giving out.
Israel: In the midst of everything to see and
do in your Holy Land, you showed me your faithfulness and taught me it didn’t
need to be about my performance. You softened my heart to your Spirit and I
heard the whispers in my heart from you. You showed me areas of my life that
still really needed your touch and how I needed to be humbled. I received it,
and watched you take my lukewarm heart and set it on fire.
Uganda: I struggled being in Africa, but you
showed me your kindness through divine appointments with people like Mylie, and
Maggie. They both are so in love with you that it encouraged my weary
heart. I look back on this month
and see how you placed passionate people in my path every step of the way, to
encourage me. You never let me go.
Kenya: You started to restore me to the joy of
my salvation. You awakened a hunger for your Word. You put a desire to be an
encourager to the family I had with me all year. You were building my faith
muscle and I saw how the impossible really is possible with you. I saw my value
in the family of God and I craved authenticity and depth with you.
Tanzania: This month was just ridiculous. I’ll always be amazed by how you gave me
an obedient, bold heart for you. I fell so in love with you this month and you
captured my heart, and made it more like yours. There were so many divine
appointments; you gave me a burden for the lost and opportunities to share your
love and joy wherever I went. You showed me how much you loved me, by trusting
me with bringing in the harvest.
Thailand: I just wanted to worship in
everything. I had so much space to
worship through dance. I loved pulling
away for alone time with you, and I was content to be used to simply love and
be loved. You continued healing me of my hurts and burdens by giving me
opportunities to share, worship and grow with the women I was with.
Vietnam: You were pursuing my heart and wanted
me to learn how to rest. I craved
time with you, and had to have it. You gave it to me and I learned to jealously
guard intimacy with you. You spoke so much truth over me and gave me
desperation for healing, and time with the Holy Spirit. You were fighting for
my freedom and I was able to lay down my burden of pride for a mantel of humility.
You began leading me away from all
the noise to the joy of being obedient to intercession. Oh, and let’s not
forget, getting my tattoo. That day was so beautiful between us, and I rested
as your love for me was written on my skin. Ani Ladodi Vadodi Li, (I am to my
beloved, as He is to me). I truly believed in that moment and for moments to
come that I am your beautiful bride, with my name engraved on the palm of your
hand.
Cambodia: I was just hungry for you. Nothing, not even ministry
satisfied my heart like being with you did. You asked me to return to my first love and give you all my
attention. This month was a turning point in identity for me. I was being
shaken again like in the beginning, but this time I was able to take hold of
the truth of who I am. I am your righteous, pure, spotless daughter and I get
to carry your DNA home with me. You’re not just my Savior, you’re my friend and
I am your beautiful princess in whom you are proud of.
I love you Jesus, my best Friend. I love you
Daddy God, who loves me just the way I am. I love you Holy Spirit, you let me
go deep and intimate anytime, and I wouldn’t be like Jesus without you!
