I have a small group
leader that uses the analogy of holding a pen in your hand to trusting God. You tell God that you’re
trusting Him when you stop gripping the pen, pry your fingers open, and just
let the pen sit in the palm of your hand.
“Yes, God I trust you.” But
really, just opening your fingers isn’t enough; He wants you to turn your hand
upside down. “What?” Oh yes, do we actually trust Him that
much, to let go completely?
To flip my hand over, to
completely let go, it is so hard to do.
I just want to hold on to the pen, but sometimes circumstances come up
and I learn that it really does no good to keep my grip. The months leading up to me applying to
the World Race had such circumstances.
In February, my car was
totaled; I had no idea how I was going to be able to get another car. It didn’t take too long for me to
realize the process of dealing with insurance and looking for a car was not
going to become a favorite past-time of mine. I was able to borrow a friend’s car and also my dad’s car,
until I finally bought one in the middle of April (and it cost lest than what I
got from insurance:)
For a little over a year
I was a Marketing Assistant. I was
so thankful for my job, the experiences I was having, what I was learning, and
some of the people I worked with.
But, towards the end of March, I lost my job. I wasn’t quite sure what I was going to do next; looking
into other marketing jobs or going to school internationally for graphic
design. Well throughout the fun
process of me trying to figure out what I was supposed to be doing, I knew
everything would be ok, that God had a plan; but I just had no idea how it was
going to get to that point. I was
still trying to hold onto the pen.
Still not sure what
exactly my next step was going to be, I came upon the World Race. I had heard of it before, but hadn’t
really checked it out. This time
when I got onto the website, it was different, there was so much that drew me
into what this whole experience is.
I didn’t apply right away, I didn’t want to just do it because the race
sounds so great, I wanted to do it if that was something God had planned for
me.
So I’m now on the
September 2010 race and really excited to see what all God is going to do. I had no idea back in February or March
that this is where I would be going next in life; I just thought I needed to
look for a car, look for a job . . . but really God wanted me to drop the pen
and let Him work.
