As we finish up our “Month 8 Debrief” in Bangkok, Thailand, I can honestly say that this has been probably the most refreshing week (or slightly shorter than that) of my life. So much has happened in such a short amount of time and, despite the fact that this wasn’t at all what I imagined debrief to look like, God was sovereign nonetheless and he proved Himself faithful. Two brief things that I learned this debrief were:
Seasons are good, because seasons show me how much I long for the cessation of seasons themselves. C.S. Lewis said, famously, “If we find in ourselves a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the best explanation is that we are made for another world.” Lewis keenly observed that there is no such thing as desire without its possible fulfillment. For example, hunger wouldn’t exist if food didn’t exist and if eating wasn’t an activity. The same is true of thirst, sexual desire, and an unending host of other things.
Nothing in this life is permanent—absolutely nothing. Our bodies change, our minds change, our friends change, our desires change, our locations change, our jobs change, our relationships change—and the list goes on and on. Why, then, if change is such a natural part of life, am I often so unsettled (and even surprised) by it? I believe it is because we are made for eternity.
Granted, some people do in fact claim to “like change”, though I would argue that the type of change they truly enjoy is found only in things and situations that are not deeply captivating or deeply glorious. Has anyone ever experience a long first kiss and prayed for it to end, simply because “they liked change” or because “they’d had enough of that?” Oh, what a foul moment that is, when blandness swallows up tantalizingly short-lived glory!
God has helped me to embrace the changing of seasons so much during the World Race. When seasons change, it becomes easier to see the beauty of the previous season. In addition, the very impermanence of seasons reminds me that included in the long list of things subject to the swift hand of impermanence is impermanence itself. In heaven, there is no impermanence. Everything great about the next life is clothed in an impenetrable fortress of permanence.
I say this all because the season has changed for me again on the World Race. I will be leaving my old team, team Deeper Roots, and leading a new team (yet to be named!). My teammates are: Brandon Forshall (thank God for a bit of permanence there!), Emily Adkisson, Mallory Martin, Jess Gasperin, and Anne Cedergren. I am both excited to lead this passionate group of Christ-followers, but sad to leave my old team, with whom I had built deep, deep relationships. Note to future World-Racers: you will change teams, and it will hurt, but you will see God’s sovereignty in it all soon after.
Resting in God is far better than resting from God. This is another one for future World-Racers. It is true that it is simply impossible to “go hard” for 24 hours a day, every day. We absolutely need seasons of rest—much more than I thought we would at the beginning of the race. When that inevitable time for rest arises, however, the question remains: “Where do I find my rest and what does my rest look like?”. If somebody tells you, “you can’t just be spiritual all the time!” they are lying. You won’t be “be spiritual” (whatever that even means) all the time, simply because, as a sinful human beings, you will likely give in to your flesh from time.
Jesus says, however, that “(his) burden is light and his yoke is easy” (Matthew 11:30) and that all who are weary should come to him (Matthew 11:28). When we are tired—be it physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual fatigue—the absolute last thing we want to do is to “take a break from being spiritual”. Of course, even calling it “being spiritual” tends to de-emphasize the uniqueness of Jesus Christ in his ability to bring rest, as it casts the restful acceptance of Jesus’ restoration as interchangeable with some more loose, undefined, (fake) spirituality.
I mention rest because I have both rested in Christ this break and rested from Christ. Needless to say, my resting in Christ (through reading the word, prayer, and both personal and corporate worship times) has left me feeling refreshed, lightened, and peaceful—like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. My resting from Christ, though it may be initially fun, and may even foster good fellowship, ends up tiring me out even more, if it is not radically God-centered in focus.
We have gotten to have some fun, as we have bowled, eaten out, went to the movies, and hung out with friends from the squad, but again, these are not the times where I gain my rest. I have found that the amount of rest I gain doesn’t really vary based on who I’m with—if I’m alone or with others—but on what I’m doing. If it’s God-centered, it brings rest. If it’s lacking God, it brings fatigue.
We head out for Malaysia tomorrow morning! Final lap. Fourth quarter. Let’s do this thing!
