This week has been hard.
In fact this week has been hard for the last 4 years.
Four years ago this week my Uncle Rob passed away, and that may not seem like such a big deal to some of you. If you could understand my family’s dynamic though it would be easier to understand.
You see growing up in a family business your whole family becomes immediate family. My uncles were like second, third, and fourth dads; and my cousins were just more siblings to play with. Was my dad around for more things? Yes. Did he brag on my cousins just as much as me? Yes.
Rob was no different. He loved his daughters Carsten and Lakyn fiercely. There was never any doubt about that. You only had to be around him for about 5 minutes before he was bragging on them. Detailing the last volleyball game for you, telling you about the deer they had shot, or the last vacation they had been on.
He was also fiercely protective of his nieces and nephews though. I remember calling the restaurant when my car got stolen in tears. Dad wasn’t there, but before he hung up the phone he asked me if he needed to come to Murray to see about me.
This week as I have spent a lot of time thinking about Rob, I realized how much I miss him. I realized that I miss his stupid rope joke being told all the time. I miss hearing all the stories about the girls. I miss him trying to scare me and the help at work. And I am so sad that I am never going to hear him brag about me on this trip.
I miss how he always knew how to make me laugh, even if that involved tickling me from across the room. But mostly I miss how my family was whole.
It’s been 4 years, but there is still a gaping hole where Rob should be, because a picture on a wall can never do justice to the memory of Rob Harned.
This week as I have shed more tears than I care to admit, God has reminded me again and again that mourning people is ok. It’s okay to still miss the ones we love. It’s okay to be sad. It’s okay to not be okay all the time. Sometimes its okay to just cry for the ones we miss, but then to remember the happy.
So even though reading it won’t do it justice, hopefully his favorite joke will make you smile.
One day a piece of rope walked into a bar. He hopped up on the bar stool and ordered a drink. The bartender looked at him and said, “We don’t serve ropes around here!”
So the rope went outside and waited. A lady walked by and the rope said “Hey lady! Will you tie me in a knot?” So the lady picked him up and tied him in a knot. Then a man walked by and the rope said, “Hey mister! Will you fray my ends?” So the man picked him up and frayed his ends.
The rope walked back into the bar and hopped up on the bar stool and ordered a drink. The bartender looked at him and said, “Hey, aren’t you that rope that was just in here?!” He replied, “I’m a frayed knot.”
Miss you Rob, and I love all of you!
Audrey
