Month one and I’ve already decided that I cannot go on. . .
A typical day in Portoviejo, Ecuador consisted of manual labor at various church properties, visiting folks in a local nursing home, listening to sermons in Spanish, and eating a whole lot of rice and plantains. My host family was incredibly gracious. I stayed in the home of a youth pastor, his wife, and their 6 month old daughter. Honestly speaking, the first week felt like it passed in very slow motion. Adjusting to an 8 am to 10 pm (or later) work schedule was exhausting. My body was not accustomed to such manual labor, especially considering the intense heat and humidity. And I hated the fact that I do not know Spanish! Considering the language barrier, I could not even begin to imagine how, exactly, I was supposed to build relationships. My expectations were not met.
The timing was perfect for my squad leader to suggest that I read the book, The Heavenly Man, by Brother Yun and Paul Hattaway. Pastor Yun’s story deeply challenged my faith and I HIGHLY recommend the book. He suffered in unbelievable ways for the sake of the Gospel. Suddenly, my complaints about the ministry being less than ideal, not having wifi, disliking or tiring of the food, being hot, and not knowing the language felt incredibly petty. I was able to refocus upon the fact that I am on this journey to serve others and not myself. My circumstances did not change; my attitude and perspective did as God changed my heart.
Just as I was finally settling in and getting the hang of things, I got sick. It began with food poisoning and then continued with a debilitating case of vertigo that persisted for over ten straight days. I had to leave Portoviejo early and travel to the capital city of Quito to be admitted to the hospital. Lying in bed for so many days (instead of working with my team and being a part of ministry) was frustrating to say the least. Because I literally had nothing else to do, I picked up my Bible and read—a lot—from Genesis to Proverbs. God was faithful and used my unfortunate circumstance to glorify Him by pouring out the truths of His Word into my life.
God has not called me to leave home in order to settle into yet another routine so that my life can be comfortable again. Rather, He calls me to depend on Him and to pursue His presence every single day. So, yes, you heard me right. God has asked me to leave myself in Ecuador and that is exactly what I am doing. My fear, guilt, shame, failures, flesh, and selfishness are staying in Ecuador so that the love of Christ can flow from my words, heart, mind, and actions as I continue on to Peru.
The reality is that I must be willing to give up everything in order to fully follow Jesus. I am called to abandon myself in order to gain more of Him. I will give up my life in order to see Jesus’ name exalted throughout the nations.
______________________
Below are photos from the nursing home in Portoviejo. Due to my complete lack of Spanish, I usually just nodded, smiled, and replied “si” as the precious men and women spoke to me. Most of them had been dropped off by family members who were never seen of or heard from again:
The photo below documents our days of manual labor. We spent lots of time with rakes, shovels, and picks while fixing up various church properties:
Below are photos of Portoviejo and the surrounding cities in which we ministered:
These are the Alliance churches where we worked:
And finally, these photos are of my wonderful team and squad:
