There is a part of my personality that drives me crazy. It is the idea of discernment or decisiveness. I have always admired people who have the ability to know exactly what they want and when they want it. People close to me know that I can be a very indecisive person. I have been told before when I go to a restaurant I should tell the waiter “just surprise me” because making a simple decision on what to eat can be a difficult task. I know, to an extent, my indecisiveness allows for flexibility which can be good for relationships or being in groups. But it continues to be on my heart that decisions about my life, my wishes for my life, shouldn’t be so foggy or unclear to me. I was at church the several weeks ago and the pastor spoke directly about this topic and what he said pulled at my heartstrings. He said something like:
“Have you ever wondered why you have that longing feeling for more? Or why, when you daydream, your thoughts lead to the same passion or to the same desire? Have you ever wondered why you operate the way you do, why you think, or act in a certain way? “
What he said next really got my attention; “ Have you ever thought those wishes or desires are the thumb prints of God; that our deepest desires mirror the image of God.”
Our wishes that we had better relationships, that we had less fear and more peace, that we were filled with deep sustaining love that could get us through the darkest of times. But when we stop and think aren’t those God’s wish for us too?
Paul wrote in Philippians; “And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ–to the glory and praise of God.”
God aches, God longs for each and every one of us to be filled with abounding love. We could have faith and hope but without love everything else will run out. God wants for us to grow in love because with growing love comes knowledge and in-depth insight of the most pure and unconditional love that is from our Father.
As we seek God, we are filled with truth rather than lies of this world; lies that tell us that we aren’t enough, that we aren’t successful enough, that we aren’t worthy enough. God will fill our minds and hearts with love if we allow Him to. As I continue to progress on this journey, I find that reoccurring theme of indecisiveness isn’t what God wants for me. What He wishes for me is discernment. He wishes that the fog would be lifted and that I can see clearly the decisions that aren’t just better for my life but that are BEST for my life. That the life I wish for doesn’t even come close to the life that God has planned for me. As I seek Him, it becomes clearer that God has a plan for me that is beyond my wildest dreams. We may stumble along the way and feel our past is too broken but God only sees me as a finished product with the utmost potential.
I hope that you all will continue to walk with me on this journey. God has put each of you in my life for a reason and none of this would be possible with out each and every one of you. God is constantly at work and I can’t wait to see what He has in store for us all!
If you feel called to donate towards my mission trip there are several fun and exciting ways that you can join me.
In order to be fully funded I still need $5,101. You can donate online at:
- http://ashleymiller.theworldrace.org/ — support tab
- Mail a check to: 407 Pine Tree Rd Lake Mary FL 32746
- Purchase raffle tickets through paypal for a chance to win a $500 target gift card: facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/AshleyMillerWorldRaceTargetFundraiser/
Paypal: [email protected]
- I have created a REI registry for people who want to donate in a more tangible way by helping me purchase the gear I will need for the next year. http://www.rei.com/GiftRegistryDetails/GR114378972
Registry Number: GR114378972
Love you all!
Psalm 116
The Lord is gracious and righteous;?our God is full of compassion. The Lord protects the unwary;? when I was brought low, he saved me.Return to your rest, my soul,? for the Lord has been good to you.For you, Lord, have delivered me from death,? my eyes from tears,? my feet from stumbling,that I may walk before the Lord?in the land of the living.
XX
