it’s 12:52 pm on a tuesday. i just finished my turkey sandwich and bag of strawberries that i brought for lunch. i’m sitting at my desk with my headphones in. i’ve got thirty-seven minutes until my next meeting. i’m staring at metrics sheets and thinking about budgets. i’ve got supporter thank you’s that need to be sent and an inbox that’s screaming for me to dwindle it down below eighty-three. i’ve got conferences to register for, strategies to write, phone calls to make and blogs to catch up on. it’s normal life – the kinds of things i do day in and day out.
on this day last year i walked into the office of adventures in missions as an official employee. and i had no idea what i was about to get myself in to.
i had committed myself to serve six months in the marketing department at aim while i was still on my world race. pizza company in thailand with a certain someone and a freak-out phone call with another certain someone from cambodia is what really got me here. just three weeks after returning from my trek around the world i made the big move across the country. i left home, started my first real job, and moved out on my own for the first time before i even had a chance to adjust back to a normal post-race life.
the first weeks were spent reading world race blogs and crying in jimmy’s office. i was smack dab in the middle of re-entry and i had no idea what to do with myself. my heart and my mind were all kinds of crazy. i didn’t want to be here. i didn’t really know where i wanted to be, but this was certainly not it. i hated not being on the field. i hated sitting behind a desk; being in an office. i missed my squad and the community i’d found. i missed my family. i felt alone. messy and broken. i was insecure in my marketing responsibilities. i was having a difficult time raising the support i needed. all i wanted to do was run away.
i thought the world race was the hard part. this gig was supposed to be simple. i desperately wanted something easier than this.
but i knew that the lord was in it. i knew this is where i was supposed to be.
slowly but surely i began to adjust. i joined a small group. i made some friends. i found some mentors. i maybe even learned how to do my job a little bit. and i even enjoy it. as i continued to fight and work and push through the chaos i found that peace started to come. and over the past months i’ve found more contentment in being here than i could have ever imagined.
things have turned out to look nothing like i expected. my initial six-month stint ended in february and i was offered a full-time position over-seeing all of the marketing for our high school and college programs. i moved into an apartment with two of the girls from my original race. i’ve found a permanent desk and finally feel at home in my corner cubicle by the window. i still miss the field, but i see so much value in helping to send hundreds of young people out every year. i still cry sometimes. but today it’s mostly from a place of gratitude and amazement at how good God has really been to me.
the last year has been anything but easy. it’s actually been hard. like kind of hellishly hard at times. but i’ve experienced such depths of goodness and only continue to find more.
it’s been worth it. so very, very worth it.
i couldn’t have done the last year without all of your faithful prayers and support. thank you for believing in me. and for believing in what the lord is doing in and through me behind my desk in the corner cubicle. i cannot even begin to tell you how incredibly thankful and blessed i feel to know you are behind me.
on that note : girlfriend over here is still raisin’ support. so if you wanna help a sister out you can. any one time or monthly gifts are incredibly appreciated. or if you just want to help cover me in prayer and support me that way [which is so valuable and i could really use] just let me know. i’d love to make sure you get all of the updates of what god is doing.
