to be honest the past month has been one of the hardest months i’ve experienced , everything seems to go wrong , there seems to be an attack every day on my faith , and i’ve cried way more than is normal .
but what i’ve realized is its all a matter of perspective . God has allowed these situations to happen because they have brought me so much closer to him, they have brought me to a place where my first reaction to any sort of attack is prayer. in the misery of it all my only comfort is him telling me it will be okay . i’ve learnt that when i ask for his help he provides in ways i can’t even explain, he is always there to comfort me and always has ways of showing me he cares more than i know . but its up to me to choose to see the good in the situation .
I know i could easily say this is too hard, it sucks i’m done!
but then what would i learn ? nothing
how many lives would i change? none
would i regret it ? yes
is that what hes asking me to do ? no
these experiences have showed me how to stand up for myself but still Love , they have taught me more about who i am and what i stand for than i would of known otherwise . and honestly those crappy days have made me stronger than i could ever imagine .
i don’t even recognize the me from two months ago . i was scared of many things , including the unknown . now i look at situations and think what great thing is going to happen next!
I refuse to live my life out of fear like i used to . the enemy knows fear was a crutch for me and continues to bring it up time and time again. and honestly its getting old, as a team mate of mine once said ” piss off satan! ” because i’m stronger than you realize and honestly a lot more stubborn too .
i’ve never been so dedicated to anything in my life . this race has become part of me and i’m more than okay with that . because it consumes me God consumes me , everyday i give him more control than the previous one and he shows me he can handle it better than i can (who would of thought )
so with that i say i cant wait to see whats next , what life has to offer including the good and the bad. because at the end of the day we get to chose how we see situations and what we allow to control us . i’m choosing to allow faith , grace and love to control me … what do you choose?
i need to raise $3,500 by September 25th to hit my first deadline
if you feel led to give please do , i want you to be part of this amazing journey of growth, self discovery, miracles and trust.
also if you could partner with me in prayer . honestly going around and telling people my vision is hard , i’m asking for prayers of supernatural boldness !
we can do it together
thank you all for your amazing support!
