“I need to get over myself”

 

God has been challenging and showing me lately how much I think                    THINGS matter.

they don’t.

 

I guess I am thinking about it a lot because I’m about to spend a year- living out of a 60 liter backpack!                                              ME. A girl that takes a suitcase and a duffle bag for a weekend trip.    ME. I pack a suitcase for an overnight stay.                                ME. One whose purse could contain a Goodwill Thrift Store.           Not to mention said year is going to be in other countries.              Different Culture                                                              Different Weather                                                                    Different Food

 

It’s not even like a “spiritual” thing. I suppose it is mostly stuff in light of the upcoming trip. Just everyday normal things that I need to stop caring/worrying about:

Comforts. 

Where I sleep.                                                                                         For example- I like my bed. I mean, I REALLY like my bed. I can honestly say I love my bed. When faced with sleeping on the floor, couch, or even an air mattress- I have a little inward “pity party”. What’s the matter? I’m gonna be sleeping on a sleeping pad soon, in who knows what locations- what’s the big deal? I need to get over myself.

The temperature around me.                                                                     For example- my car. Even my house. Well anywhere really. I can’t stand being hot. I dislike it. I honestly get frustrated easily when I am hot. What’s the matter? I am used to being able to just turn the air up. I’m not always going to have a thermostat to use and mess with temperature- what’s the big deal? I need to get over myself.

 

Preferences.

Things I eat.                                                                                           For example- I am kind of a picky eater. I have likes and dislikes. There is food that I don’t like because I don’t like the texture of it, there is food I don’t like because of the color of it, there is food I don’t like because of its taste and there is even food that I am prejudice against and don’t like it! What’s the matter? I am not going to be able to pick and choose what I eat all the time- what’s the big deal? I need to get over myself.

My pace of life.                                                                                       This one is kinda a big deal… There’s the fast-paced stuff:

  • Driving from point A to point B- STOPLIGHTS are such a BIG deal
  • Phone calls- being put on hold is such an inconvenience
  • Internet connections- those little pinwheel “loading” symbols? So annoyingAnd you don’t even want me to get STARTED on those lines in Walmart!!

*Walmart aside, all this stuff takes what? Two minutes, MAX? What’s the big deal? I need to get over myself.

Looks.

This one is a little deeper, I guess, just because I’m going to categorize it outside and inside.

Outside.                                                                                                 For example- make up. I feel like I ALWAYS need to be wearing make up. Or at least have some that I could wear. It’s like a “security blanket”. What’s the matter? I’m not going to be having make up at my disposal- remember: limited space in the pack… :))- what’s the big deal? I need to get over myself.

 

Inside.                                                                                                Okay, so this is the one that is taking it a little deeper. When I say inside- I’m talking about the insecurities of not looking good enough. THIS, I know, is EVERYone. You know- my legs are fat, my teeth should be whiter, or I wish my skin was clearer. These thoughts are not from God. God created us. You think that God created something not beautiful? I think God created something not beautiful? What’s the matter? Thinking like this is distraction/discouragement. What’s the big deal? I need to get over myself.

 

Now, I’m not really sure that this blog makes as much sense to you as it does to me. :)) I don’t necessarily have a great way with words.

I guess in a nutshell this is me blogging about how girly girl I am. I don’t know. But I do know that this is what I felt impressed to blog at 2:30am about. :))

 

<3 Ash