So in 4 days I will be boarding a plane all by my onesie to fly to Atlanta for launch. *insert scream* I’ve spent the past month in a flurry of preparation. Vaccinations, shopping, Drs appointments, prescriptions, ordering gear, just to name a few things. It has been intense and stressful. Leaving Orlando and moving back to my parents house in KY at the beginning of Sept. was among the harder things that I have had to do in my World Race journey. Saying goodbye to all of my friends and the community I had spent 2 years building hit me right in the honey nut feelios. I think I cried every day for about a week and a half. I walked away from all of those amazing humans knowing that I was stepping out into Gods plan for my life but struggling with the reality of what that meant. Traveling around the world loving people is going to be incredible but I would never have the chance to be with that group of people in that same environment ever again.
God longs to meet with us outside of our comfort zone. If we were always snug as a bug in a rug we would never need to depend on Him for anything. Part of the reason that I chose the WR (and the answer I hear from a lot of past racers) is a longing for something more. A sense that there had to be something bigger than Sunday morning Christianity. We can be in relationship with Jesus and be actively giving and serving and still never experience the true depths of who He is and all that He intends for us.
Surrender has kind of been the theme word of my WR journey. Firstly surrendering my will to apply in the first place, and continually surrendering after that. Surrendering all my discomfort and anxiety for the sake of fundraising, surrendering my established group of friends for a squad full of strangers, surrendering my home and family for a backpack and the community of Christ.
One thing I do know is the God never asks us to give something up unless He has something better in mind. Which means all of the frustration, stress, tears, anger, and sadness is going to be worth it for whatever He has in store this coming year. This is a truth that I am constantly forgetting. When lack of funds, discouragement, and loneliness stare me in the face I am not proud to admit that it is not my first instinct to run to God and praise Him for His faithfulness.
But at the end of the day it has all come together. I’m not fully funded (yet) but I have enough to launch with my team. My pack will be full. I will be surrounded by an amazing team whose hearts are all passionately seeking God with me this year. He has been faithful and He has provided. His mercies are new every morning and His grace is sufficient. By His grace and His grace alone I am going to make it but only by daily surrendering to Him and His will.
