A few weeks ago I said goodbye to the place that had been my home for the past three months. I don’t like goodbyes. They are never easy, but when you invest three months into a place, not only are you saying goodbye to the people there, but you are also saying goodbye to the person you were for during that time.
God taught me so much in those three months in El Salvador. He taught me to stop talking to Him or at Him, and actually listen to what He has to say. He showed me that I don’t need to be afraid of failure. He taught me to let go of the lies I had believed and acknowledge the truth that He has declared over me. He taught me that it’s okay to be angry with Him, He will love me through the anger. He has told me that I am precious and adored in His eyes. He taught me so much about His grace and His never ending love. And finally, He taught me what it means to love without restraints and live fearlessly in Him
When I first arrived in El Sal, I struggled to connect with the older children, but in my final month there, thanks in part to the La Casita program, I became very close to some of the boys that were the oldest in the program. They became like little brothers to me. We picked on each other, teased each other mercilessly, and laughed as they made fun of my broken Spanish. I loved them in a way that I didn’t know I was capable of loving. During a time when I was learning what it truly meant to love without restraints, to hold nothing back, these kids came into my life and found a way past my walls into the darkest corners of my heart.
Saying goodbye to my life in El Salvador was hard. It was hard to say goodbye to the friends that I had made and the little brothers I had found, but the hardest part was saying goodbye to the person that I was for that part of my life. I liked the person I was in El Tunco, but no matter how hard I try, I can never be that person again. And I am learning to be okay with that because, although I don’t like goodbyes or change, I don’t want to remain the same. Even if it’s painful, I want to change, because if I never change, I can’t grow into who God called me to be.
Much love,
Anna
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Ministry Update: I live in Malawi! My team lives in a village within Lilongwe, which is the capital city of Malawi. We are doing ministry in the surrounding villages and each day holds a different ministry opportunity.
(blog coming soon)
