Here I sit in my tent inside Deliverance Church in Nairobi, Kenya. I have always wanted to go to Kenya since I was a little girl and now I am finally here. The majority of the people are so friendly and full of love, but Kenya has not been what I expected. I love Kenya don’t get me wrong and I am beyond excited to go and see the Masai tribe on Monday, the food here is delicious (I’m talking mashed potatoes instead of rice!), and I absolutely love Sunday morning worship, but I do not love the city. I guess I never really knew how much I loved the wide open spaces back at home where I could run around barefoot, walk through the garden snapping off beans and eating them, and feeling the fresh breeze and warm sun on my skin. Sure I loved going to Grand Rapids to walk around, see the art gallery, or go to concerts. And Chicago is fun to visit as well, but living here in Nairobi is quite different. Your life becomes Frogger: Real Life Edition where cars don’t ever really stop, there is so much traffic, exhaust fumes and other pollutants coat your eyes, nostrils, throat, and lungs, and you must watch your every step or you could fall down into what I can only hope is a drainage pipe.
Technically I have only done 4 days of ministry because 3 days into Kenya and I got Typhoid, but the ministry is good. As I mentioned earlier the people here are so friendly and hospitable. Let me break this month down for you.
Saturday: Paradise Community Center.
Sunday: church service.
Sunday night until Saturday: sick.
Sunday: church then bed because I was exhausted,.
Monday: free day so I went to the mall with some of my teammates.
Tuesday a little bit of ministry in the morning and then rest,.
Wednesday until now: ministry full time.
I have taught for 30 minutes on a biblical lesson to some 8th graders. I have gone door to door on a college campus. I have done some office work. I have gone back to the same college campus to help with their mission week. Today we will go door to door around the church. All of this is great and wonderful ministry. I know it really helps our contact out and it brings the Kingdom. So I can say that this country girl is surviving, but I wish I could be thriving.
Maybe it’s because I was sick for a week and I miss home, or maybe it’s a spiritual attack, but I really don’t feel like I am thriving. At times I feel so claustraphobic or like I am dying. My lungs scream fro fresh sir. my ears strain to hear the birds singing over the honking and roar of the traffic. My roots have been uprooted and transplanted into a concrete pot with little room to expand. That's how I feel. God's natural and beautiful creation is hidden from me behind the smog, and buildings. I have read so many people’s blogs from their month 8 and it always seemed like they were thriving. I guess I glued myself to the spirit of comparison for a long time. I know I am being used here and I know God sent me here for a specific reason; I just have yet to figure it out. I have been listening to “All Around Me” by Flyleaf on repeat for a long time. Part of the lyrics say, “And I can feel you all around me / Thickening the air I'm breathing / Holding on to what I'm feeling / Savoring this heart that's healing / Take my hand I give it to you / Now you own me / All I am / You said you would never leave me / I believe you / I believe.”. It’s been a good song for me so far this month. I believe that God is all around me even here in the city and I know he is healing my heart. I am giving him my hand this month because I am not going to make it out of here by myself. I believe that he won't leave me and that in 109 days he will bring me back home.
I’m one tough cookie though. I have broken or fractured at probably 14 bones (including fingers and toes). I played in mud puddles and climbed trees for fun. I’ve thrown hay form the wagon up into the hayloft, wrestled pigs back into their pen while wearing a dress and still managed to wash up, change, and make it to graduation on time. I worked 5 jobs at one time in a summer, survived college, grew up on a farm, and grew up with 2 pesky, but equally tough sisters. My whole life has shown me how to survive. So I will take this month and next month (we will be in the capital city once again making 7 of our 11 months in a major city) to learn how to survive in the city and maybe just maybe God will show me how to thrive there. Please say a pray for me tonight that the city life will grow a little more on me. Pray that I wouldn't just be surviving. Pray that the Kingdom of God flows through me these last 109 days.
