This was started on May 11th, finished May 13th.
With one week until training camp and about 7 weeks until launch: my emotions are finally catching up to me.
I'm not sure if this could be considered a "breakdown" or not, but I feel so lost, overwhelmed, blessed, encouraged, confident, yet scared, and every emotion in between.
(Listening to Fix You by Coldplay probably doesn't help either….)
Up until 2010, I didn't have a single friend that lasted more than a year. I didn't have a time-bomb or anything like that; friendships just disintegrated for me. I had people I would/could talk to, but not really anyone I could count on, lean on, or reciprocate any friendship-type things.
Until last night though: I didn't realize how many friendships I developed since then and people I am truly upset about leaving.
Honestly, and maybe I'm a horrible person for this, but I didn't think I was going to miss many people. Not because my friends aren't wonderful or anything like that!!! I've just had a wall up and a routine memorized that told me over and over that friendships don't last, relationships end, and new people will be my friends soon after. Then the cycle would begin a gain.
Last night though, sheesh, I saw one of my best friends for the last time until Summer, maybe Fall, 2014 at the earliest. I felt like a truck hit me because I realized not only was I saying bye to her for a while, but I had a lot more people than I thought I would miss when I had to say bye to them too.
So, right now, with tears in my eyes, my heart racing, my stomach turning, I want to say thank you and I love you to a few of my closest friends that have made it past the 1 year mark, have shown me what true frienship and Christ-love through people, and have been my key support system throughout this process of going on the race:
(in no particular order):
MB Thompson: This girl is my bestie. We're alike in so many ways and from the first time we met, we've encouraged each other to seek Christ unconditionally and were willing to beat the silliness out of each other if satan tried to win. Figuratively of course 🙂
Christina Strawn: My hobbit. (Yes, you're my hobbit. 😀 ) Seriously, this girl's love for Christ and devotion to Him is amazing! In the past 2.5 years, she has grown in such a way that the only way to explain it is a complete and total surrender to God. Her encouraging words and prayers have kept me from doubting God's plan for me so many times. I wouldn't be where I am without her.
Catalina Prato: This chica is straight up cray. haha. I seriously love my Colombian sister like if she was my own sister. Her faith is what true unshakable faith looks like. Right from the start of this journey from the world race, she's been rooting for me, supporting me, and praying for me. Through the craziness of life and faith, she's defintely shown me what friendship should look like. I couldn't have asked for a better best friend or latina sister in Christ.
Samantha Burris: Momma! She is my "spiritual mother" and mentor. Quite honestly, I don't think I would be a Christian right now if she and her hubby (Wesley) hadn't taken me in and not only taught me with words, but with actions as well, what a Christian truly is and who Jesus is in a tangable way. She and Wesley both never cease to encourage and pray for me, and with confidence I know I can count on them for Godly-wisdom. I freaking love you two <3
These gals have been my support system through and through this journey. I seriously can't thank God enough for bringing these women in my life. From day one, I wouldn't of imagined to be as close, or even for as long and the friendships and sisterhoods have developed. I just wanted to say thank you to these chicas, because I know I won't be able to before launch. (Too many tears.)
Let the journey continue!!
