Hi dear friends,
It’s been a little while since I was last in touch, the reason that is, is because I’m currently involved in this thing called “Let’s not fail out of school and try to graduate from college in May…”. This step in life is something that I have been seeing for so long to be so far away and I feel like I woke up yesterday and realized I was about to crash into it (just to give you a glimpse of life right now).
I continually think about the life that I would be living if I had never decided to live a life of obedience to Christ. I wonder it all. the. time. Honestly I don’t really know why my mind wanders over there so much but it sure does. I have definitely seen myself go through these thoughts and reflect in thankfulness, joy, heart break, and perspective but I think i’ve realized that it’s a little simpler…a lot simpler.
The past couple weeks have been days in which Jesus has absolutely blown me away. The kind of days where you just want to crawl into your bed and weep. so I did. I wept. I wept for the crap that was going on in life but I especially wept for the fact that I have finally gotten to the point where all I want to cry out is that
the things we do
the life we live day by day, hour by hour, means absolutely
NOTHING
without
Jesus Christ.
I realize that this is a very simple statement…but do I continually, consistently, and truly believe this to be true?? Because for the longest time I sure didn’t.
We are all in a place in life (wherever it may be for you) where there are struggles, confusion, anger, stress, and doubt but there may also be joy, laughter, and good! The thing is, I continually try to balance all this as much as I can. I take out my planner and figure out the formula that is going to make this as peaceful and simple as possible. unfortunately, that is crap.
“DO NOT SEEK BALANCE, SEEK THE LORD”
We have been given the most gracious gift ever known. As I continue to ask myself that question “what if I didn’t know Jesus right now?” I have learned that in those times where we’re in bed weeping, I am no longer weeping in pity for the crap and hardship in life, but that Jesus wants us to weep in remembrance of Him! because without Him, we have nothing.
Friends, we were all created to be dependent on Christ. So let’s do it.
“…without me you can do nothing” John 15:5
love,
Ana Maria
