As part of my preparation for the world race, I get to read a book called Kingdom Journeys- Rediscovering the Lost Spiritual Discipline. We are discussing it in small groups chapter by chapter, and the questions for this first chapter are really good, so I thought I would share it with you.
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How are all of us already on a journey in life?
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Where is your life headed?
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What is your life’s purpose?
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When will you be satisfied?
If you had asked me these question before I applied for the World Race, I would have had all the answers easily.
I would have said that life IS a journey, we don’t pick the start or finish, but God has a road map if we are willing to follow Him. And my life is heading exactly where I want it to go. Got my jobs, house, car, and fulfilling ministries. Maybe some day a husband and kids, but I’m content where I am. My purpose is to serve God, specifically in youth ministries, hence the best jobs in the world: working in a high school, volunteering at Youth for Christ, leading youth group at my church, teaching Sunday School…And yes, I am satisfied. I am very comfortable in this life. If you would have told me in ten years nothing would change, I would have thought that was the best news ever.
But something has changed. I heard about this awesome mission trip around the world. It sounded amazing and exciting, maybe a bit terrifying at times, but I wished I could do something like that some day. I never thought I would really do it. I mean it’s like $20,000 when you add it all up. And a year away from home, safety, and comfort? Nevermind, I’m good here at home.
But God put a restlessness in me. He kept reminding me that satisfaction isn’t the goal here. He kept opening my eyes through everything I did. While I sit here snuggled up on my couch there are people dying out there without ever hearing the name of Jesus. Kids are sold into modern day slavery. Others starve to death while I munch on my favorite snacks. God put in me a desire for change. A longing to do something about all this. Yes there are things I can do here at home to help, but there is more to this restlessness than that. I want to be more, to know God more, to go where there are people who may have never heard the name of Jesus. I want to be His hands and feet. I want to see miracles and wonders.
I have gone to Bible camps, Bible college, church, read books, done my own studying, and all of this has helped me to grow spiritually, but I want more. I want to go out there and fully rely on God. It’s too easy to do things myself, too easy to escape difficult situations. I have family and friends who can support me. Some days it feels like I don’t need God. That scares me. I want to learn to trust Him more. I want to let Him mold me into the person He created me to be.
It may be that after my journey I could end up back here doing the same things, and that ok with me, but I want to be sure that this is what God wants for me. Perhaps while I travel He will reveal a new purpose for my life. Perhaps the same purpose, but new location. But regardless of all this, I want to get out of my comfort zone and let God have all of me.
