Joshua 1:5b “…I will be with you; I will not fail you or forsake you.” (NASB)
I opened my notebook 5 minutes ago, not sure how I was going to start this blog. It’s not a blog I planned or wanted to write. It is a blog I have to write. This verse is the first thing I read in my journal, exactly what I needed in this moment.
At the beginning of this short year, 2014, I am learning to have a deeper faith in the Lord. I started Believing God, by Beth Moore on the 2nd of January. God is so timely, and loves us so much. He knew this was a book I would need, and would have the words I needed to read. I may have to go home not because I don’t have the money, I am FULLY FUNDED, and have been since September but I’m still sick. I may have to go home. Words, I never wanted to have to even ponder. I don’t want to go home, but the doctors are having trouble diagnosing me. I was diagnosed with Hepatitis A in September because of something I ate in Honduras. The problem is I’m still fighting elevated liver numbers and some other symptoms. Since then I have taken multiple medicines and visited numerous doctors. It has gotten expensive and I’m working with insurance to see if I can get it covered. Until then I’ve used up my extra resources and now dipping into my bill money which was already shy of what I needed. I am in need of help financially to cover my medical bills and also to help cover my bills back home. So far on the race I’ve spent $1500 on medical issues, $1000 in the last week. I’ll be real honest I don’t have that much in reserve.
The problem continues with the doctors unsure of what the problem is, they are not comfortable with me continuing to travel. I want to continue on the race and am working on that solution but with the financial pressure and the illness pressure I am overwhelmed with what to do. God is so good though He has been teaching me so much. In Matthew 17:20 Christ tells us “nothing will be impossible.”
“…you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move; nothing will be impossible to you.” (NASB)
He tells a specific mountain to move. I believe this mountain, the mountain of illness, and financial burden can move. I believe it can be gone, here’s the thing, God may not remove it from me. I may have to go home. Bottom line though, God is still God, and He is still good. It doesn’t change. Beth Moore says it like this in her book, Believing God, “So there you have it. Beloved, if you pray that God will move a mountain and He doesn’t, or you have the faith to tell a mountain to move and it won’t, assume Christ wants you to climb it instead and see Him transfigured. Either way the mountain is under your feet.” (pg. 150) Whether I stay or go home, God will still have all the glory. He will use it to show His glory. I have no doubt that He can heal me, but now may not be the time. I have peace in that. I know my Redeemer lives.
I’m writing this blog for a couple of reasons. One so you know what is going on; two so you can be praying for healing, financial provision, wisdom for the doctors and myself; three for support. If you would be willing to financial help me with the medical cost or bills at home please consider donating to my PayPal at [email protected] or sending a check to my parent’s house at 2626 Redbud Way New Braunfels, TX 78132. I am so thankful for all of you and all your support. Thank you! Please know this I am not finished fighting the fight to stay on the race and whatever happens all the glory belongs to Christ.
