Yep, the title says it all…it’s true, next Sunday I will be baptized at the hand of Gary Tillman, my boss, my pastor, my Cairo father, my friend. I surprised him earlier this morning with the unusual request—I’m sure he had no idea I was about to ask if he’d baptize me when I asked him if we could talk after worship. Ha! Ha! Surprise!! I love his response… “There’s never a dull moment around here is there? …but I love it!!”
ahhh…I love it too Gary…I really do.
I’ve been thinking about baptism quite a bit these last few weeks. The thought was planted in my head by another World Racer (thanks Shawna!) and I’ve yet to shake it. I was baptized as a baby in a Lutheran Church, so the certificate says. Looking back, I so appreciate this dedication into the Christian faith. My parents were publicly saying that they would raise this child (ME!) into the faith of Christ…and I think of the Lutheran Church too. Well, most of that is true, I was raised into a Christian home though it was not Lutheran, it actually ended up being Catholic.
Baptism has always been a funny thing to me, something I’ve never really quite understood. And as I type this today I can’t really say that I finally have this intellectual grasp on it either. I just know that it is important. I think the thing that makes it so confusing, at least to me, is all the different ways of doing it. Each denomination goes about it in a different fashion, with different words, different purposes. Do you sprinkle as a baby, submerge as an adult, godparents or no, a confession of faith, a willing heart, a dedication of upbringing?? There are so many variables with so many different meanings and implications. I must admit I’m still confused.
As I do with most of my confusions I turn to God and to His word for answers. I’ve been asking Him recently what the big deal about baptism is. I mean really, is it not just a bit of water? What’s the point, right? Ok, but John the Baptist says this in Matthew 3:11-12
I baptize you with water for repentance. But after me will come one who is more powerful than I, whose sandals I am not fit to carry. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire. His winnowing fork is in his hand, and he will clear his threshing floor, gathering his wheat into the barn and burning up the chaff with unquenchable fire.
Still confusing I know, but here’s what I pulled out: “water for repentance” Repentance, ay? I say to myself, I’m repentant, right? Or more like, I
want to at all times be repentant before the Lord. And I want to be part of that wheat that is gathered into the barn in the last days. I constantly ask Him to burn away the chaff in my life, those things I hold on to more than Him. I want to be burned with the fire of God. I cry out, “Refine me!!” Even Jesus himself had John baptize him in the next verses:
Then Jesus came from
Galilee
to the
Jordan
to be baptized by John. But John tried to deter him, saying, “I need to be baptized by you, and do you come to me?
Jesus replied, “Let it be so now; it is proper for us to do this to fulfill all righteousness.” Then John consented.
As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and lightning on him. And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love, with him I am well pleased.”
Wow. This story is pretty amazing to me. Not only is Jesus baptized with water, the Holy Spirit descends upon him at that moment. I think to myself, I want the Holy Spirit to rest on me. I want God to say to me one day, ‘This is my daughter, whom I love, with her I am well pleased.’ Would that not be the best thing you’ve ever heard?! God saying he is pleased with you…what can compare? I’m pretty sure that is my one goal in life, to be loved by God and to be pleasing in His sight. So many things flow out of that relationship, out of that love, out of that intimacy…but that is another blog…
And so the ‘why’ behind my getting baptized basically comes down to the fact that I want to be known by God in a more intimate way. I want to be filled by Him in every way. I desire water for repentance and His Spirit within me to guide me in truth, to speak into me, and to ultimately bring glory to His name through me. I want my life to count for something and so I loose it for His sake. This act is simply another testament to His good work in me and a cry for Him to continue it unto completion.
Does this mean I’m renouncing my previous baptism or renouncing the Catholic faith I was grown up in? By no means! I highly value the faith I was raised in and the lessons that have been brought out by it in my life. This act is a personal one and I do it because I feel God calling me to it, not because others desire it or think it necessary. My aim is only to please HIM.
Father, thank you for paving the way and coming to this earth for our sins. Thank you for showing us the need for repentance and your plan to empower us with the Holy Spirit. May you continue to shower your grace upon me daily as I seek to walk nearer to you. You are precious to me Lord and my love for you will never end!
