Reading. I’ve been doing quite a lot of this lately. I’d have to say I’ve done more reading now than I probably ever have! I’d say it reminds me of being in college again but, let’s be serious shall we, I didn’t even read this much in college!!
I’m in the middle of reading about 4 books on the required reading list that I go back and forth between, catching up with postings of other World Racers online, journaling and going through a Warrior’s Journal and Listening Prayer, meditating on and trying to memorize scripture…whew…at times my head just spins with information overload! And this doesn’t include the news headlines I like to browse in my spare time and the research I try to squeeze in on the countries we’ll be headed to. Throw in a few hours of ebay searches for a waterproof jacket, hiking shoes, and just the right tent and we’ve got a full out project running here. I like to think of it as ‘Project Preparation.’ (ok, so I don’t really think of it as that…I actually just came up with the name, but thought it sounded cool with the alliteration thing going on there…ah, I digress…)
My thoughts have pretty constantly been on this preparation process—all the things that need to happen, the supplies I need to secure, the money that must come in, the physical preparation, emotional, and spiritual. It is quite the endeavor. At times pretty overwhelming, it’s been hard to move forward when the thoughts of how huge this thing is begin to take over my thoughts. Nasty lies from the enemy begin to cloud my head—lies that tell me I will never be prepared enough to make a lasting impact, that everyone else is much more qualified than I am, that the money will never come in so just stop now and save face, you’re not really a warrior so stop trying to tell yourself that you are, you won’t make a difference even if you do go!
Yikes. Satan can be brutal sometimes.
When I allow those lies to penetrate even one layer of my heart a sedentary ennui, a sort of listlessness, or a willful melancholy, seems to settle over me. In these times it’s hard to even recognize the battle that rages right before me. The battle for souls will not just begin once the race starts, oh no, it has already begun in the hearts of us as we prepare to head out. In fact, it is raging wildly all around each one of us, World Racer or not, if only we would wake from our lethargy and recognize it as the battle it truly is. I’ve heard it said many times over, one of the devil’s schemes is to convince you that he doesn’t even exist and that there is no such thing as a spiritual battle.
Let’s take that lie and expose it for what it truly is. Let’s awaken from the sleeping silentness Satan has us comforted by and rise into the warriors we were created to be for Christ. Let no man tell me what I am not and let nothing stand between me and my Lord. I’m realizing this adventure of being a Christian is an active one. One where we must take constant stands for truth and know to what we have been called. To know this we must prepare. And so here I sit, ready to “hit the books” again so that I may more fully understand this calling.
Lord, give me strength to stand, to move forward in your truth. Please allow your word to penetrate my heart so that I may know how to fight effectively. Protect me from Satan and guard my heart. Teach me your ways oh God and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
