I have realized that whenever I mess up, make a mistake, say something stupid, or act out of insecurity and my flesh, I begin to think that no one could possibly see more good in me than bad. That somehow, that one act of foolishness in a moment just exposed who I really am, and that anything good, pure, righteous, holy or right in me is overwhelmed and nobody can see that anymore. That’s not the truth, though.
That’s really a lack of any proper perspective though. It’s quite ridiculous actually. The truth is that God is doing a continual work in me, and there are still areas that need more work than others, but the necessity of work in one area never negates the regeneration of life that has happened in another area.
I was reading 2 Corinthians 7 where Paul mentions how he didn’t like to grieve the church with his first letter, but that it was necessary. It was necessary because they were not living in truth and life as they should have been. They had some pretty significant issues to be dealt with – divisions in the church, sexual immorality, lawsuits, marriage problems, idolatry, arguments over how to have Lord’s Supper, disagreement over gifts, worship, and a lack of love. No wonder it says they were grieved when they received the letter. I think if I read all that I would be crushed! But he says they had Godly grief that led to repentance.
But what is most exciting to read is that even in the midst of Paul having to write this hard stuff to the church, he still saw the good in them and bragged about them to Titus!
“For whatever boasts I made to him about you, I was not put to shame. But just as everything we said to you was true, so also our basting before Titus has proved true…I rejoice because I have perfect confidence in you.”
Paul had
perfect confidence in the people that had all these issues! They loved Jesus but still had to learn the same way we do now, through mistakes and correction. God the Father sees us though the blood of Jesus, made holy and blameless. It encouraged me that just as Paul had confidence in the Corinthians and boasted about them, even in the midst of their sins, and that I look at others and see not their sin so much as their beauty, so also most people see me. Most important though, which is the harder thing to grasp, is that EVEN IF nobody on earth could see through my mess, my wonderful FATHER always does.
His grace is abundant, His mercies new every single morning, His faithfulness to me greater than I can imagine. He forgives and forgets my every sin when I come to Him in repentance, tossing them away from Him, as far as the east is from the west, never to be found again by Him.
Oh, Jesus, heal the wounds that cause my insecurities. Forgive my unbelief. I DO believe what you say you have done in my life. Help my unbelief. May I rejoice in other people’s calls, and still rejoice in my own, recognizing that you send us down different paths for Your GLORY, and for our
best benefit. Everyday I want surrender my life to you, choosing to abide in you, to walk in your TRUTH, and not the severely warped perception of my own flesh and mind. Thank you for seeing me through the blood of Jesus
.
“For our
sake he (the Father) made him (Jesus) to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the
righteousness of Christ.”
