I realized I also want to write about life on the race in a more general, update-like manner. I don't need big revelations or illustrations to be able to share about them in a blog. So, I'm beginning my "Choose Joy" series today. The race is not easy stuff. It's messy, hilarious, painful, and a unique for every person way of living your life for a year. Hopefully this will give you, my loves, supporters and potential future or current racers, a better understanding of what I'm experiencing and learning. 🙂
From being Less to blooming with my Wildflowers to sparking a Wildfire.
One of my favorite aspects of the race is that we live and do life together. All day, everyday. No one's allowed to be alone – ever. Let's just say I savor my shower time and the rare occasion that I find myself alone in a room for like 10 minutes. We're halfway through month 7 and I believe we're getting the hang of this community thing.
I've been blessed with amazing teammates throughout this year. I don't think it's a secret that my first team, The Less Thans, was absolutely awesome. Did I love them initially when I met them at training camp? Not so much. I still remember our first awkward conversations and our first feedback session. Hilarious. But, as I spent the time between training camp and the end of month 3 praying for them, living everyday life with them, and getting to know them my tune changed a bit. As much as I would have loved to spend all 11 months with these friends and team changes are hard I know it was better for me to let them go: to not hold their hands (figuratively) all year but to hold them in my heart. (It's okay to saw "aww" right now…)
Julian's been raised up to squad leader so he gets to use his big heart and smiling face to bless our entire squad as well as everyone he meets! Rachel Rae still has a passionate relationship with God. She's currently back in the USA hopefully getting sound medical attention and complete healing – although I have loved our bonding time spent in hospitals, she's been through enough and I know she would still appreciate your prayers and encouragement! Dundore still eats ice-cream with me whenever the squad's together… and he finally wrote a blog about his true feelings towards this race, haha. 🙂
And I still get to do life and ministry with my two might-as-well-be-sisters-at-this-point: Sunny (Jessica) and Cici. We've spent everyday since January 8th together as teammates and I am so thankful for their companionship, honesty, laughter, and encouragement.
I tried really hard, probably too hard, to find my role within my first team. Looking back I know I was the unity instigator and I honestly desired for us to be close. I know I put effort into making us talk about the hard things. One day we were walking down the street and I exclaimed, kind of loudly, “Why can't we all just hold hands?!” Sunny and I still joke about it. I think it was right before team changes and I was frustrated because a few people were walking so far ahead. 🙂
At the end of March I was placed on our all-girls team, my wonderful Wildflowers. (Sunny, Cici, Brittney, Christel, & Hannah. Emily Wright was raised up as a squad leader and only spent one month as an official wildflower, even though she was one in our hearts.) We based our team name on the Message version of Isaiah 61 verse 11. “For as the earth bursts with spring wildflowers, and as a garden cascades with blossoms, so the Master, God, brings righteousness into full bloom and puts praise on display before the nations.“
We talk a lot on the race about having our teams be a “safe” place. To be ourselves, to share, to challenge, to push each other. Our month in Nepal was great for team-bonding. Even when we were covered in sweat and mosquito bites we were laughing [or crying] about it together. They were there when I went through my first stomach-bug sickness. Back at training camp I wasn't real excited for the idea of being one a team with only females… but I love it. These ladies have challenged me in HUGE ways mainly because of the grace and strength that they walk in everyday. They let me be me: all the time. I've been able to truly be joyful. To dance like a fool in front of them (and the whole squad…) while Hannah raps. To cry my eyes out and not be ashamed. I would say “Why can't we all just hold hands?” and then we sometimes would. 🙂
At the end of Thailand (month 6) we went through another set of team changes. I again had peace about what was coming even though I hated the thought of losing another epic team. We talked a lot about desiring to go deeper. To continue to go through the hard things together and not have to “start over” in the sense of learning how to work as a team. They decided to keep our team together and give us the equally epic Jess Hurst as a 7th teammate.
We renamed ourselves “Wildfire” because we're the 'same, same but different' as our team before but, with a new spark. Acts 13:49 (the message) “And this message of salvation spread like wildfire all through the region.”
Sunny is a spirit-led leader who always has a listening ear for me. Cici is so caring and has grown so much this year, we love to laugh about how far we've each come. Christel hears so clearly from God and is living her life with such intentionality that it's challenging to everyone around her. Hannah is easy to talk to and laugh with and together we create Hanison – I clearly enjoy her company. Brittney is sweet and passionate and always willing to give great Biblical advice. Jess cracks me up, shares my love for babies, and has so much wisdom and experience with missions.
We're not perfect and at month 7 sometimes it's harder to put each others needs and wants before our own. But, this month as we do Ask The Lord and Unsung Heroes I genuinely feel like I'm traveling and navigating Cambodia with 6 friends.
My grandma has a quote hanging on the back of her bathroom door on a plaque with a picture of two dandelions. I always stared at it when I was little. It said something along the lines of:
Don't walk in front of me, I might not follow.
Don't walk behind me, I might not lead.
Just walk beside me and be my friend.
And I think that's what the race means. Despite our “roles” or titles we're just meant to do life together. To prefer each other even on the days that it is the most difficult thing ever. To choose joy even when people are driving us crazy. I still exclaim “Why can't we all just hold hands?” all the time whether I actually want to hold hands or not. It lightens the mood and reminds me that real relationships are worth fighting for. I think God thinks the exact same thing. He created us for Christian community for a reason. So maybe we're not supposed to hold hands, literally, but to be there doing life next to each other.
You can read all of my current and past teammates blogs by finding their names at:http://www.worldrace.org/?tab=participants&group=13W0104 I thankfully have all of my funding for this trip but, all of my Wildfire teammates still need funding to make the final deadline on Aug.1. You can donate on any of their blogs or contact me for more info!
