We wandered over to the little brick house, our feet following the African dirt road.
The woman sitting inside shared a smile and a full-hearted laugh.
“Saoo bona, onjanee!”
Hello, how are you!
My heart felt drawn to her.
It wanted to know the paths she’s walked, the pains she’s felt, and the victories she’d won.
My friend in the village, Numthwubo, explained that Frola hadn’t been able to walk on her own in three years. She spends her days sitting on her bed in her tiny brick house, accompanied by the few grandchildren she parents during the day.
This is her life.
Gosh my heart hurt for her.
Something I always do is put myself in the shoes of others, and in this case, her shoes weren’t going very far.
I sat next to her on her bed and wrapped my arms around her. How often does someone stop by just to give her a hug, I thought.
I asked Numthwubo to translate the words “you are beautiful,” for me. We talked about life and what she wished it could be like. She still had such spirit and faith. “I pray everyday, and though I’m in pain I know Jesus hasn’t left me.”
I walked home that night and my soul felt stunned.
There are times something like this happens and I can’t come back down to earth. Times when all the worldly worries feel so insignificant.
“It’s a blessing and a curse to feel everything so deeply” I thought.
I didn’t feel like people really understood and embraced the pain Frola was feeling. And as I walked home, my mind heavy, talking to my friends only made me feel empty.
I often feel like my soul is stunned more than others. Like someone else’s pain penetrates my heart, leaving vibrations.
I can still feel when it seems that other people have just forgotten, moving on to talk about something else, you know, the weather and all those important things.
This is the hardest part for me.
When I see something soul stunning, something life-changing, I feel it fully. And it’s so difficult to continue feeling the depths of people’s pain when others just aren’t.
It makes me feel so alone.
I’ve learned that the Father gave me a special heart. One that feels and sees others beyond normal.
A heart like His.
And as challenging and lonely as that can feel sometimes, I’m so incredibly grateful for it. Someone’s gotta take the time to hug Frola and tell her she’s beautiful. Spend time with her and hear what’s troubling her heart.
The Lord wants me to use the heart He’s given me to give it to other people.
Even if that sometimes means feeling a little alone.
