Over the last year, time and time again I’ve heard people say, “I wish I could be doing what you’re doing!” 
There seems to be this suggestion that because I’m out here traveling to 3rd world nations, hugging on cute kids with the hopes of spreading God's love that somehow I'm more qualified or have better circumstances that enable me to do so. Or that I’m braver or perhaps even holier. People have even gone as far as to compare me to Mother Teresa (giggle), which is clearly a misperception.
Mother Teresa's humble heart and dedication for serving the poorest of the poor led her to become a public icon. She was a woman of purity. A woman who truly walked by faith and not by sight. A woman who gave her entire life to the cause of spreading God's love.
In contrast, I'm not that humble, and I’ve had my fair share of experiences with sex and alcohol (sometimes simultaneously, sometimes not, but both of which I currently abstain from). I love driving fast. Sometimes my music taste is a bit inappropriate, and sometimes I enjoy watching movies that contain crude humor and violence. So far, I've only dedicated 11 months of my life to the cause of spreading God's love in 3rd world nations. Clearly, I’m nothing like Mother Teresa.
But then again, perhaps Mother Teresa wasn't even really like the "Mother Teresa" we've imagined her to be.
Yeah, sure, Mother Teresa was a saint… a Godly woman… a hero to orphans… but she too was a real person with real struggles. If you’ve read anything about her you already know that she struggled with doubt – often not feeling the presence of God in her life yet still sharing His love with the world in a real tangible way. But don't we all struggle with our faith at times? Doubt's a part of the human condition.
But so is lust, and the longer I’m out here on this journey, the more I realize that I’m not the only woman in the world who has moments of struggle with it. Nor does it disqualify you from being used by God to accomplish His will. It doesn't exclude you from the noble call of clothing the lost and hungry with His love. And if I had to guess, I’d say that at least once or twice in her life, Mother T had a few moments of struggle with lust too. Or maybe she had a few moments when she thought she was about to lose it and just wanted to slap a kid…. but didn’t.
The point is this: often we tend to elevate people to the place that only God deserves. Yes, Mother Teresa was an amazing woman. But much like the rest of us out here, her life – and all that she did – was compelled by the extraordinary love of God.
God doesn’t require remarkable, perfect, pure people to do His work. He only requires the willing — willing sinners. Like me. Like Mother Teresa. Like you.
And that’s about the best I can say for myself: I’m out here not because I'm pure or even a good person. I'm out here because I was willing. I was willing to travel around living out of a backpack. I was willing to walk away from the most incredible career opportunity I could ever have. I was willing to sacrifice the life I loved – a life of comfort, prosperity and financial security. I was willing to give up a year of dating. I was willing to truly live by faith, jumping head first into the unknown of God’s awesome and mysterious plans for my life. I was willing to forego western toilets, Dunkin' Donuts, hot showers and occasionally toilet paper.
And let me just say, compared to all that He has blessed me with on this incredible journey, it's all been worth it!
And as much as I dream to be able to fly, giving all that stuff up doesn't make me some super hero. Like others, I'm just an ordinary, willing sinner doing mostly ordinary things through the extraordinary, captivating love of God!
Are you willing to say yes to the specific call He has for you? Are you willing to step out in faith? Are you willing to risk boldly for the cause of love? Are you willing to let go of what you think is best and put your life in His hands? Are you willing to live a radical, marvelous life compelled by the extraordinary love of God?
HE is able… but are YOU willing?
Dear Papa, thank you so much for choosing me… to be an ambassador
of your marvelous love. May you always help my heart to remain willing…
