I'm moving to Texas!!
(Yeehaw!)
Yes, this completely New England, never really traveled past the borders of New York girl (except for this one time to California), is going to be moving to the land of two seasons- hot and hotter. My status is this: after two and a half years, I'm single, after three and a half years, I'm unemployed, after twenty years being in Connecticut, I'm moving to the South; seems crazy but this is all such an answer to prayer.
For a little while there, I was trying to picture what my life might look like once I had completed my associate's degree but I was finding nothing of severe interest thereafter. I was thinking of what kind of car I would invest in, what type of job I could do and for what wages, wondering if I would live at home or try my hand at moving out: all of this has a time and a place, but I was just being drained by the thought of it all. Where was the real meaning? What was the eternal value? Did I honestly care about saving up for a new car, or could my money be better spent elsewhere?
Then suddenly, the opportunity of a lifetime appeared~ The day that I returned home from SoulFest, this huge four day Christian music festival, I meet with my pastor's wife. We typically hung out on a weekly basis, talking about life, God and upcoming decisions, etc; but towards the end of our conversation (assumedly the last one to be in person because she was scheduled to move later that week), she brings up this one last point. She and her husband had been discussing and praying about this offer for months without me having the slightest inclination of what was going on behind the scenes! She casually, yet intently says, "We want to extend the invitation for you to move down to Texas with us and stay until you leave for the World Race." 🙂
*blank stare*
"Wait, what?"
At first I didn't know what to think. I primarily thought it wold be an amazing, totally foreign experience, but I also worried about the progress that I might lose for the World Race in terms of fundraising. I thought how amazing it would be to live with a family who I had drawn so close to over the past year, being able to learn from them, surrounded by their years of experience; yet, I was caught up in the prospect of money for the World Race. How could I raise that type of money when I'm so far away from all the people who I've known for my whole life? All the people who knowww me. How could I possibly fundraise in Texas where I knew almost no one, didn't have a church, couldn't possibly formulate a garage sale of any sort (as I would only be moving down with the essentials and my ferret). These thoughts clouded my mind for the next day: I felt that God was being quiet in my times of prayer because I didn't hear an overwhelming "YES" or "NO WAYYYY" from Him immediately. A part of me said, "Go," while the other part of me said, "What are you, crazy?" It was sometime after the initial proposal, considering how I would have to leave my job, put college on hold and dwelling on the worries that surrounded my World Race funds that I heard God speak.
"But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all of these things shall be added unto you." Matthew 6:33.
I didn't know where exactly that verse was from in the Bible at the time, but it's truth was buried somewhere in my heart and God kept on bringing it to the forefront of my mind. Every time I would experience doubt, that verse would come up like a neon sign in my direct line of sight. So I began to process the opportunity: why would I be doing to Texas anyway? Yes, it would be an awesome opportunity to experience more of the world, but that was basically last on my list of reasons to go. I would be going to Texas, abandoning all of my Own pursuits to seek Him more. I would be in an environment where I could concentrate on Him, not myself. I know full well that during my last semester of college I would be completely distracted and that my time with God would end up getting halved. If pattern speaks anything at all, I know myself- I would unintentionally let the world get in the way. Amid six intensive courses, how could I really focus on anything else- like the large task of fundraising, while keeping my job on top of all that? It would be a stretch just to conform my schedule to some type of group Bible study. I know myself, I know I'm weak in that area (time management). So really, going to Texas wouldn't be for any reason but for Him; knowing Him more, taking more time for Him, deepening my relationship in a way that wasn't readily available here in New England; here, where all my distractions were so plentiful.
I was sitting on my bed, reflecting the rationale for Texas when I looked to my right at some of the pamphlets that I was given while walking around at SoulFest and felt the urge to look at the one at the top. I don't usually take time to read these guys during the festival because I'm so preoccupied with the music, but this one called my attention; it was like Matthew 6:33's scriptural sidekick. On the front of the pamphlet is reads, "Can you die to yourself for one year?" I thought, well, I think the World Race will be doing a pretty good job of catalyzing that. I then flipped it open to read, "Yes, everything else is worthless compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord." -Philippians 3:8. Who would I be living for? Not me. How much greater is the value of knowing Christ over my college degree being timely; investing in my dream car; living comfortably; holding onto the areas of my life where I *think* I have some measure of control?
Uhh. A lot (understatement of my life).
So, I repeat: I am moving to Texas!! The fundraising for the World Race is something I have to be active in and doing with it as Much as I can; however, I know that ultimately God is going to be the one to provide it all. Do what is possible, God will do what is "impossible"- "For nothing is impossible with God." Luke 1:37.
I do have a major deadline coming up, guys. I need to have $3,500 in my account before I would be leaving for Training Camp which is in the middle of October. "These are deadlines, not suggestions" as the reminder letter I got reads. So please, if you can, visit the "Support Me!" page: I would super appreciate any donations you might have on your heart!! Thank you all so much and God bless! <3
